Feeling a Moment
by H. James
Summary: Based on a S4 spoiler that never came true. Brooke centered with different ships. Possibly BL.
1. Feeling a Moment

**Disclaimer: **I do not own One Tree Hill or its characters. Although if I did… things would be pretty different around there.

I started this story a while ago and it's based on previous spoilers that said Brooke would get sick on Season 4, which she never did. We did get a very short scene between her and Mouth early on S4 when she said she had to tell him something but we never got to know what. That's when Mark was going to start her cancer storyline but decided otherwise, God only knows why. I'm attempting on going on with that and changing something along the way. I apologize now if some medical details or terms or something aren't accurate. I did try to research as I could to make it real, but if I failed to do so, my apologies.

HUGE thanks to Cami (B. Davis) for being such great beta-reader and for her BL enthusiasm that makes me keep writting. LOL. You rock, sis!

This first chapter is short and it was meant to be short, just like, a teaser, if you will. I have a huge part of the story written so far but it's not even close to an end. So expect a long fic here. Thanks for starting to read and I hope you'll keep on reading! Now I'll stop and let you start.

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The surroundings of a doctor's office are pretty much all the same, especially the waiting room. Aside some decoration aspect here and there, they all have the basics: the receptionist's balcony, a couple of couches and chairs – usually very comfortable since you'd be spending an awful amount of time actually doing the waiting – some plant to break the serious atmosphere of being in a doctor's office and a coffee table with a few magazines older than the receptionist herself. The magazines are always about decoration or National Geographic, so the themes never get old and the articles never get too out of topic for the first readers.

Brooke Davis had a copy of an indoors decoration magazine and was carelessly flipping through the pages without paying too much attention to the articles and just glancing at the pictures every now and then. She had been sitting on that same chair for the last 25 minutes and sighing loudly every 4 of them. The young woman behind the balcony noticed her impatience but couldn't do much to help her, unless pray for the doctor to ask her for come in already.

Her cell phone broke the tension as it vibrated inside her hand bag. She glanced over the girl behind the balcony and mouthed something of an apology. It wasn't forbidden cell phones or anything, but the almost religious silence inside those walls asked for permission to be broken. Or so Brooke felt that it did. She reached down for her cell phone and flipped it open.

"Hello?"

It was Haley on the other line. She was five months pregnant and had asked Brooke to be the baby's Godmother, which she happily agreed to be. Two weeks before, Brooke had the genius idea of throwing a baby shower for her friend as a thank you and the event would be held the next day at Nathan and Haley's apartment and the decoration was yet to be set. Brooke knew how Haley liked to plan things ahead so she could prepare herself. And now they were late with the decoration.

"Brooke, it's me. Where are you? You were supposed to be here this morning to help me start the decoration for the party. Everything's here already, except for the food and – "

Haley was interrupted by Brooke's sigh, "I got it all, Hales. Don't worry. Bevin's taking the food and drinks with Mouth and Skills later today so we can have some time to decorate and take as much as we can out of their way. Cause last time I checked, your place was kinda hectic."

"Yeah!" Haley's voice got higher and it hurt Brooke's ear for a moment, "You dumped all those boxes with a bunch of colorful stuff in three days ago and told me you'd help me fix them up! Now, where are you?"

She glanced around and sighed again. She had to lie, "I'm on my way. Just… relax, OK? Everything's gonna be fine" she added the last part more herself than to anyone else.

"OK" Haley was convinced and told she'd wait for the girl to arrive before hanging up the phone.

Brooke put her cell phone back inside her purse and uncrossed her legs to switch them on top of each other. It was going to be a long wait, she could sense it.

Fifteen minutes after, the interphone rang and Brooke lifted her eyes to meet the woman's as she reached out for the speaker. She nodded quietly and then turned it off, opening a polite smile to Brooke.

"The doctor's ready for you, Ms. Davis."

Brooke thanked the woman as she got up from her seat and walked towards the big white door that lead to the doctor's room. The older woman was already waiting for her by the smaller door with a nice smile and her hand extended in the air for Brooke to shake. She did so and returned the smile with a forced one. Both women walked in the room and the doctor closed the door behind them as Brooke took a seat by the desk.

"So, Brooke, how are you today?"

The question came out on a fake casual tone that Brooke always hated on doctors, and she knew well just how she was supposed to respond to that. Not that it really mattered, the outcome of that appointment would be the same with or without her faking her contentment in being there, waiting for exams results with her heart on her hands while the sun shinned outside and most of her friends were clueless about what was going on with her.

She played along, "I'm good. So far" she added the last bit with a weak voice.

Another polite and calculated smile. That woman was good on appearing to care. Brooke leaned foreword on her seat as the doctor opened her exams to take a look at them. Why couldn't she have done this before she walked in, Brooke thought. It'd spare her the suspense and she wouldn't have to try to study the woman's reaction to her reading for that long.

"Well" she finally put the papers down on her desk, "I was just finishing reading your exams to make sure I got everything" she took another pause to fix the exams on top of each other on the desk.

_This is torture._

The woman took a deep breath, leaning foreword and putting both arms on top of her desk, staring at Brooke in front of her, "Remember how we talked about the possibilities? It could be something surgery-ly treated or it could be something a little more" she chose her words, "Complex."

Brooke only nodded along, "And it's the latest."

Sympathy smile, "I'm afraid so" she didn't wait for her patient's reaction, "Now it's the time we talk about options. And you have some, so…"

Brooke nodded along again. She couldn't really react to any of that cause that wasn't happening for real. Not to her. Not right now. It wasn't possible.

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_The title of the fic is a song by Feeder. Read the lyrics, it has a lot to do with the story. Oh, and do review! I really love those._


	2. Comfort In Silence

First and foremost, I wanna thank you all for the nice reviews you left me. I'm glad you guys liked the teaser and are gonna keep coming to read more! It really means a lot to me.

And second, but not less important, I wanna send a GIGANTOR thanks to my sis and roomie, Prue (HaleyBub). Because she always reads my story before anyone else, she's like my test-audience! And because she's always going "OMG:wow:" when she reads it and once she even said this story was going better than the show! (to be fair, it's S4, it's really not that hard to write anything better that _that_.)

With that said, here's another chapter. I hope you guys like this one as well.

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Drive back to Haley's place was one of the hardest things Brooke had to do in the last few months. With the exception of the first time she went to get checked up at the doctor's office, this was pretty hard. She had to drive all the way to the apartment without breaking down, because if she did, Haley would be able to tell at the first sight. They had never been best friends before, but after they lived together for a while, Haley was able to read Brooke like an open book. And Brooke could also read Haley. Add their daily growing friendship and yeah… Haley would know.

She parked the car right outside the building and got off, clicking on the button to turn on the alarm system as she walked towards the front stairs. Climbing the steps, she took deep breaths trying to regain her calm and collect herself before pressing the door bell. Haley opened the door with one hand as she held a bunch of colored napkins on the other hand. She looked agitated.

"Thank God!"

Brooke was pulled in by her friend and spun around to take a look at the place. It was definition of hectic for sure. There were floating balloons everywhere, especially by the corners, four huge cardboard boxes spread around the living room with some decorated letters hanging out by the edges and some more stuff around that Brooke couldn't describe since Haley was once again in front of her, gesticulating.

"Look at this mess, Brooke! What are we gonna do?"

"Whoa" Brooke nodded agreeing with her desperation, "I see what you mean. But don't worry, Tutor Mom" she added with a smile, "We'll work it out."

After reassuring her pregnant friend that everything would be alright, she marched to the hall's closet and disappeared as she walked in, looking for something. Haley got on the tip of her toes to peek inside and see what the girl was doing. Brooke came back out with a foldable stair on her hands and a smile on her face.

"First things first: we need to hang those letters up and then the banner. But don't worry, I'll do it. You're too pregnant to be hanging from stairs."

Haley rolled her eyes. Everyone was so protective of her lately it was starting to get annoying. She could see why Nathan would be like that – he was always overprotective – and even Lucas – who was always equally overprotective – but now Brooke? She couldn't stand that anymore. She was just pregnant! It wasn't like she was sick or elderly or something.

"Whatever" she announced annoyed, "Just do it fast because I can't be in this mess anymore. I think I might get a rash or something."

Brooke couldn't help the laugh she let out as she climbed up the steps from the small stair. At least she was still able to be amused by Haley's hormonal dramas.

Not too long after that, Mouth, Skills and Bevin arrived with the food and beverages. They put all the stuff inside the refrigerator and then started to help around with the decoration. It was going to be a long day. Seeing Brooke tying knots on the balloons strings, Mouth approached her with a careful look, not to make anyone suspicious. He leaned closer to her as if to help her and whispered.

"How was it?"

She took some time to raise her eyes to meet his as she kept on tying the knots. When she finally looked up to him, she had a small smile that hardly expressed any kind of happiness. He took a deep breath and she dropped the balloons strings on the side and softly took his hand, leaning him towards the door.

"Mouth forgot some pies on the car, we'll get it!" she announced to the others as they left the apartment.

They walked back to Bevin's car in silence with her still holding his hand. They stopped next to it and she leaned back against the passenger's door, taking a deep breath preparing to give him the bad news. He crossed his arms in front of her and waited.

"I went to get the results back" she stopped and stared at him trying hard to make the words come out of her mouth, "It's not what we wanted."

So it was bad news. He knew that already from the moment he saw her expression when he asked her how it went. He already knew that, but hearing her actually say the words was so much worse. He could barely hold back the tears that insisted on surface on his eyes. She noticed he was about to cry and couldn't help wrapping her arms around him. He hugged her back.

"I'm sorry" she sadly whispered on his ear.

He broke down and stared to cry. It wasn't her fault, why was she apologizing to him? He thought she'd be crying too, but she wasn't. She couldn't. She had made an enormous effort to stand strong so far and she wasn't about to lose that now. Not when she had people waiting for her inside the apartment, people who would tell she had been crying if she did so. A couple minutes later Brooke was back inside the apartment without Mouth and without the pies. She told Haley he had forgotten about them and drove back to the Café to pick them up. It wasn't true.

An hour and a half later, Brooke, Bevin and Skills were gone and Haley's place was finally presentable once again. It was heavily decorated, but at least one could walk in without stumbling on anything. She went back to her room when Nathan opened the front door. He had spent the afternoon with Deb and after that he went shooting ball with Lucas at the Rivercourt. He was all sweaty and tired, holding his basket ball on his hands. He glanced around the living room and frowned just when Haley came back with a smile.

"Hey! You're home!" she launched to plant a kiss on his lips and quickly stepped back making a face once she felt his sweat, "And disgusting!"

"Did a baby bottle explode or something?" he asked still glancing around.

Haley giggled and shook her head, "It's for the baby shower tomorrow. Remember?"

He nodded along as he walked towards the bedroom. She followed him and watched as he dropped his ball on the armchair and opened the closet, searching for a clean towel. She rolled her eyes when he couldn't find any. When was he going to learn that the towels were kept on the hallway closet? After grabbing him one at the right closet, she threw the towel on him.

"So, I don't have to be here for this baby shower thing, do I?" he asked already pleading.

"Don't worry, no boys allowed."

"Great" he smiled and turned around heading towards the bathroom, "I'm gonna take a shower."

Haley smiled to herself and walked after him inside the bathroom. He hung the towel on the hanger and turned around to see her leaning against the doorframe, tracing invisible circles on her bump, with her index finger. She had a half smile on her lips.

"Can we join you?"

Nathan took a moment to consider the idea of him and Haley naked in the shower, but then he shook his head, pushing her out of the bathroom.

"Oh, no, no. Last time you two joined me in the shower, you talked me into take a bath and I ended up having to rub your feet for 40 minutes."

Outraged with the accusation, Haley put both hands on her waist, giving him a dirty look, "I did not!" she kept her look but once she saw he wasn't gonna break, she rolled her eyes, "Okay, maybe it was like 20 minutes, not one minute longer than that! And may I just remind you that I have to carry your child all day long? It's tiring! So excuse me if I need a foot massage every now and then."

He walked next to her and pulled her closer by the waist. He voice was soft, "I know that, but if you want a massage all you have to do is ask. You don't have to trick me into it."

But her hormones had already taken over her by then. She pushed him away from her grasp and walked towards the bedroom door, without looking back.

"I don't trick you to do anything. And since you insist, I'll let you take your shower alone."

"Haley" he called out to her as he followed her around to the living room, "Where are you going?"

"To the Café" she said grabbing her jacket and putting it on, "Mouth never came back with those pies. Don't worry; it's not a trick so you can drive me. I'll walk so then later I can actually trick you to rub my tired feet."

She shot him one last look and slammed the door on her way out. Nathan sighed heavily and threw his hands in the air as he spun around to return to the bathroom.

Working behind a balcony with a six months pregnant belly wasn't as easy as Karen remembered it was the first time. The fact that she wasn't eighteen anymore didn't help either. Although the doctor said she shouldn't be doing any heavy lifting or too much exercise, Karen couldn't keep herself away from her Café. She had promised Lucas she wouldn't work as much, so she had to hire some extra help. Haley was almost as pregnant as she was so she had reduced her shifts the last couple of weeks, giving Karen one more reason to spend her time around the place.

Haley walked in the Café with her purse hanging from one shoulder and glancing behind the balcony with a smile. Karen returned the same smile as she cleaned the counter with a cloth.

"Well, look who it is… Haley James-Scott. I had almost forgotten what you looked like."

"Oh, Karen, please!" Haley begged as she took a seat by one of the stools, "It has not been that long."

"No? I haven't seen you in eight days."

Haley's face turned into a puppy one, "OK, then maybe it's been a while" she promptly stood up from her spot and walked around the balcony, to give Karen a side hug.

The woman returned the hug and kept cleaning on the counter as they chatted a little more, standing next to each other. After a minute or two, Brooke walked in holding an open notebook on her hands. She walked straight to the counter with a pleasant smile.

"Hi!"

She greeted the two of them who greeted her back. Leaning over the counter, Brooke got on the tip of her toes and peeked over it just to see Karen and Haley's bump next to each other. They were so close, or maybe just too big, that their bumps were actually touching. Brooke grinned.

"Play date?"

Haley rolled her eyes and Karen held a giggle. Brooke smiled along and placed her notebook over the counter as she grabbed a pen inside her purse and fixed her hair behind her ear.

"So, Karen, I came to confirm your presence tomorrow at Haley's baby shower."

"I'll be there" she nodded.

"Great" Brooke ticked Karen's name on the list and then glanced at Haley quickly, "I just have one thing to talk to you about the gift… but the mommy to be can't hear this."

"Say no more" Haley turned around, "I'll go check for the pies in the kitchen."

She left Karen and Brooke alone. Brooke waited to make sure she wasn't going to hear them talking and then turned back to Karen while glancing down at her notes.

"Okay, so I was thinking of making a theme for the presents. I know, it's a little too on time, but say if this is too cute: basketball. Right? I mean, it's a boy and it's Nathan's son, so… it's a given. So I was thinking all the baby presents have to be b-ball related. Is it OK? Or did you already buy the present and it's too late now to even exchange it?"

Karen saw the trace of excitement on Brooke's face and softened her own as she shook her head, reassuringly, "It's not too late. And I think it's a great idea."

Brooke smiled weakly, "Thanks."

There was something different about that girl standing in front of Karen. She was usually a force of nature, making everyone and everything around her aware that she was in the room. She was usually awfully loud or speaking too fast to anyone even grasp the idea of what she was talking about. And that was one of the things that made Karen really like Brooke: she was full of life, but not the Brooke sitting on the other side of the balcony that night. That Brooke was faking a weak enthusiasm and barely succeeding on fooling Karen of the opposite.

"Brooke" Karen's voice was almost a whisper, "Is everything OK?"

"Huh?" Brooke lifted her face to look at Karen. She had lost herself in her own thoughts for a second and totally zoned out, but Karen's words brought her back, "Uh, yeah. Everything's fine."

"You know you can tell me anything, don't you?" Karen reached for the girl's hand over the counter.

Brooke looked down and saw their hands together. She felt an urge to say something, to share the pain that was growing inside her, but she didn't. She couldn't do that to Karen. Karen was pregnant of a man who had been killed even before she knew she was carrying his child. She had enough problems of her own to have to deal with Brooke's, too.

"I know" she nodded.

"I'm always here for you" Karen tried again, squeezing her hand.

Brooke nodded one more time, "Thanks, Karen. But everything's OK. Really."

She forced one more smile to reassure what she had said. Karen smiled back, for Brooke's relief. In fact, she wasn't sure if she was that relieved. Maybe she needed someone to really notice something was wrong, maybe she needed someone to know her that well. But she wasn't sure if she wanted that.

Brooke left the Café shortly after her quick conversation with Karen. She gave Haley a ride home and then headed to Peyton's house to confirm the girl's presence at the baby shower. Not that she needed to go there in person, she could easily call to confirm, but she felt like she had been avoiding Peyton enough as it was ever since her and Lucas started dating. It had been Brooke's little final push that got them together, but that didn't mean she was ok with seeing them together all the time. She already saw too much on the school's halls during the week. She just missed spending time alone with her best friend.

She parked the car outside her house and walked to the door, ringing the door bell. She waited for two minutes before the door was opened revealing Peyton's figure. She had a smile on her face and was already with her pajamas on. Brooke glanced at her quickly and arched one eyebrow.

"A little early to be asleep, isn't P. Sawyer?" she asked already walking in.

Peyton stepped aside to make room for Brooke to walk in and then closed the door behind them. She followed the girl around up to her bedroom. Once they got in, Brooke dropped her purse on the bed and headed to the bathroom.

"Not that's not great to see you, Brooke, but what are you doing here?" she sat on her own bed, staring at the bathroom's closed door, "Because as you stated, I was going to sleep."

"Already?" Brooke's voice was muffed coming from the other side of the door, "Where's Lucas?"

She wasn't sure if it was ok for her to ask Peyton that, but she thought that if Peyton was dating anyone else other than Lucas then it'd be ok. So she had to make it ok for her to ask even though she was dating him. She was her best friend still and Lucas was with her. She could live with that. Probably.

Peyton was surprised with her question, but decided not to make a big deal out of it, "He played ball with Nathan at the Rivercourt the whole day long. He was tired so he called it a night."

"Oh my God!" Brooke squealed from inside, "Are those new boots? They're fabulous!"

Hearing the excitement on Brooke's voice made Peyton laugh. She missed fun Brooke. Actually, she missed any version of Brooke lately. She had been too distant from her, but she could understand. Even though she made it clear she was ok that Peyton was with Lucas, Peyton knew it better. It was going to be hard on her at first, but eventually she wished they could go back to what they once where.

"Yeah" Peyton raised her voice again to make herself be heard, "But I used them once and they hurt the back of my ankle so bad I needed to use a band-aid for three days."

"Why don't you exchange them?"

Peyton sighed loudly, "I've been meaning to do it, but I don't wanna go all the way down there not knowing if they have another pair to give me in exchange."

"Call them. You bought them at Zoe's, right? I have their phone on my cell."

Peyton heard the flush and giggled. Why did Brooke have a shoe store's phone number on her cell phone? But then again, it was Brooke… She glanced around and saw Brooke's purse right next to her and reached out to it, opening it to find her cell.

"Is it in your purse?" she asked already digging in.

The bathroom's door was abruptly opened and Brooke rushed out, knocking the purse away from Peyton's hand and holding it tight together. She had a scared look on her face, as Peyton was both scared and confused by the girl's reaction. She frowned, although she was trying to smile and break the tension that built up immediately around them.

"Brooke, what's wrong?"

"Nothing" she answered quickly as she sighed trying to calm down, "It's just that…" she hesitated, taking some time to think of an excuse, "I have a sample of the party's gifts in here and you can't see otherwise you'll ruin the surprise."

She forced a grin and Peyton seemed to buy it for a moment and rolled her eyes. Brooke breathed in relief seeing the girl change the subject to what kind of music they'd be playing at the party. But she couldn't really pay attention to what was being said, she just kept holding her purse tightly against her chest as if protecting it. She had her medical results in there; she didn't even want to think of what could've happened if Peyton had found them like that.


	3. How To Save a Life

Thank you all for the lovely reviews! I loved each one of them, so keep them coming!! This chapter is a little longer but I really like this one. All the Karen scenes were a request of my beta-reader - the lovely B. Davis - and I actually enjoyed writing them. Hopefully you'll enjoy reading them as well!

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The next day ran smoothly 'til the party time. Except maybe for Haley who was nervous the whole day long, just thinking about all the mess the apartment was gonna be after they were done. Brooke called her twice to make sure that she'll take care of everything afterwards and she didn't have to worry. Right after it got dark, the girls started to show up at Haley's place. Brooke had invited the whole cheerleading squad plus Karen and Deb to the party. They all showed up with no exception and brought a bunch of gifts, more than Haley thought her baby could possibly ever use. After they ate and drank for a while, it was time to the present game. Brooke would hand Haley one wrapped gift and Haley would have to guess what it was without opening it. They played that for a while and when it was time to open Bevin's present, it took forever for Haley to guess it, so eventually she gave up and opened it.

"It's a breast pump" Haley said realizing it.

Bevin frowned with a dumb smile and shook her head, "No! It's a beer bong for babies" she explained matter of factly.

Karen and Brooke chuckled at the same time and Rachel rolled her eyes at Bevin, "Sure, because every baby needs one to help them on their way into childhood alcoholism."

About two hours later, most of the girls had gone home and there was only Brooke and Karen left behind to help Haley around. They were moving around, picking up dirty dishes and torn wrapping paper from the living room and putting in the trash on the kitchen. Brooke was leaning down over the trash can, shoving some papers in when she felt her head getting lighter. She immediately got up and the room around her spun too quickly. She put one hand over the kitchen counter to support herself and keep from falling down. Karen was almost next to her and saw when she closed her eyes, breathing deeply.

"Are you OK, Brooke?"

But Brooke didn't answer; she only nodded her head slightly with her eyes still closed. She opened them again and gave Karen a tiny smile. Karen smiled back and turned around to put the dishes on the sink. Haley walked past them and joined Karen when they heard a thud. They turned around and saw Brooke leaning against the wall. She had stumbled on the coffee table and was trying not to fall. They both rushed over to her and Karen placed one hand on Brooke's back to lead her to the couch. Haley looked concerned.

"What happened? Are you feeling alright?"

Sitting on the couch, Brooke took a deep breath and tried to talk, but her voice came out on a tone lower than a whisper. Haley took a seat next to her and brushed some of her hair away from her face, feeling her forehead.

"You're so cold, maybe it's your blood pressure" she turned to Karen who got the hint and went to get a glass of water.

"I'm fine, really" Brooke managed to talk after a while.

Karen handed her the glass of water and she sipped it, "You should go home and rest. I'll finish up here with Haley."

Haley nodded agreeing but Brooke shook her head, "No way. You're both too pregnant to do this by yourselves."

"Then we'll finish it tomorrow" Haley decided, "Or we leave it to Nathan when he gets home" she added with a smirk that made Brooke smile a little wider, "But you shouldn't be driving if you're feeling dizzy or something. You can crash here if you want."

"No" she shook her head again, getting up slowly, "I just need to go home and rest. I'll be OK."

"Let me drive you then" Karen suggested grabbing hers and Brooke's coat, "I was gonna walk back home but Rachel's place is closer to my house than here, so I'll drive you there and then I'll walk home."

"Alright" Brooke nodded and turned to give Haley a hug, "I hope you liked your party. Except maybe for this end now" she made a face and Haley laughed.

"It was great, Brooke. Thanks for doing it by the way."

"Anytime!"

Karen hugged Haley goodbye and left with Brooke. They got in the car and Karen drove them all the way to Rachel's house. They didn't talk much during the ride, just small talk. When they arrived, Karen parked the car outside the house and turned to Brooke who looked weak for some reason. Maybe she didn't eat enough at the party and had an empty stomach, Karen thought.

"We're here" Karen announced.

Brooke glanced outside the window, to the big house in front of them and nodded, turning back to look at Karen on the seat next to hers. She didn't want to go in, because that meant she'd be alone. Rachel was there, but probably sleeping already or even if she wasn't, she didn't know. She couldn't know. Or maybe she could, if Brooke told her, but she wouldn't understand. She didn't want people asking her questions or feeling sorry for her when she told them. The only person who knew what was going on was Mouth and only because she couldn't take keeping that secret from everybody, she needed to share the burden with someone. And she had chosen Mouth. After she told him, she immediately regretted doing it. It wasn't fair to drop a bomb like that on the boy and then ask him to keep it to himself and just watch her live in denial for the next couple of months. She just needed somewhere safe and comfortable to go. Somewhere she knew she could simply rest without worrying, and not alone.

Karen seemed to have guessed her thoughts, at least some of them, when she touched Brooke's hand smiling, "It's still pretty early. If you're feeling up to, what do you say about a cup of hot chocolate before calling it a night?"

Brooke smiled pleased and nodded, "Sounds perfect!"

Karen smiled back and turned on the car again, driving to her house.

Two cups of hot chocolate later, Brooke got up to start doing the dishes but Karen held her arm to stop her from doing so. Brooke insisted but Karen assured her she didn't have to, it was Lucas' turn to do the dishes the next morning so he'd do it. They kept talking a little longer sitting by the kitchen's table and just when they started to run out of subject, Brooke felt like she had to go. She didn't really want to, but she had to, it was getting really late and she had school early the next day. Karen glanced at the clock at the wall and sighed.

"Well, it's getting pretty late" she watched Brooke glance down and agree with her reluctantly, "Uh, Lucas isn't coming home for the night so I've got an extra room" she smiled pleasantly, "In case you wanna stay here tonight. So you don't have to drive all the way back."

Brooke wrapped her arms around herself and shrugged with a smile, "That's probably a good idea. All this hot chocolate is messing with my sugar rate anyway; I don't think I should drive."

Karen chuckled and Brooke did the same. They both got up and Karen told she'd get her something to sleep on while she made herself comfortable in Lucas' room. Brooke did as told and went to the bedroom that had the door already opened. She stood by the door, looking in. That room brought up more memories than she'd like to have. It didn't seem right for her to be there with Lucas, it surely didn't seem any less wrong to be there by herself either. She slowly forced a careful entry while glancing around to see if anything had changed since her last time there. No, not much. With the exception that her pictures with Lucas had been taken down from his nightstand and replaced with one of him and Peyton and another one of him and the basketball team, everything else looked the same to her.

She took a seat on the edge of the bed and sighed, glancing around. It felt weird to be there. She put one hand down next to her and ran it through the sheets. She couldn't help the chuckle when she realized it was the same sheet with colored balls Lucas always used. She definitely knew what to get him for his next birthday. Before she could drift in thoughts even more, Karen softly knocked on the open door to make herself noticed and walked in holding a folded pajama on her hands.

"I hope they fit" she handed them to Brooke, "It's pre-maternal so I guess it's OK."

Brooke took the pajama and rested it on her legs, "Thanks, Karen" she smiled and then added, "For everything."

Karen got closer to her to place a kiss on the top of her head, "Anytime. Try to get some sleep; we all had a busy night."

The girl nodded and watched as she was again left alone in the bedroom. Karen closed the door on her way out, and Brooke sighed again before getting up to get changed. It was considerably even weirder to be naked on Lucas' room again, so she changed it into the pajama as quickly as she could.

It was around 2 am when Brooke got up from the bed she had been trying to sleep on for the past few hours – unsuccessfully – and went to the kitchen to heat up some milk and see if she could get back to actually sleep. The teapot filled with milk had just been placed on the stove when Brooke heard a clear of throat behind her. She turned around and found Karen on her pajama and a robe thrown over her shoulders. She smiled at the girl, rubbing her eyes.

"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" Brooke pulled up a chair to make Karen take a seat. The woman did so and shook her head to calm her.

"No, I just get my morning sickness in the middle of the nights. I'm surprised to see you up."

Brooke took a seat next to Karen and sighed, playing with the hem of her pajama, "I couldn't sleep. I tried relaxing, counted sheeps, counted the balls on Lucas's sheets… by the way, are those the only set of sheets he owns? Cause I swear…" she stopped when she saw Karen giggling and smiled looking down.

There was a brief silence between them before Brooke got up to turn the fire out and pour warm milk in two mugs, placing one of them in front of Karen and the other one holding with both hands, to heat them up. She sat back where she was and stared at the woman in front of her, uncomfortably.

"Brooke" she started softly, "You know I'm here for you, don't you? Despite of what happened with you and Lucas, I still care about you. So I'd like you to know you can always count on me, for anything."

"I know that" Brooke reassured her with a shy smile, "And I'm really grateful for that."

"OK" Karen nodded and leaned back, "So you wanna tell me what's worrying you? I can see something's going on."

Looking at the woman sitting across the table from her, Brooke sunk on her seat. That was her perfect opportunity to tell what was happening to her and she knew if she didn't tell then, she wouldn't anymore for a long time. She just had to find the courage to it in her. She started with a smile to comfort Karen somehow and then sighed, preparing herself.

"I'm sick" she blurted it out, surprising Karen and herself for a moment.

Karen took a moment to recover from the information. She blinked a couple of times as if trying to figure what to say next and leaned foreword on the table, "Sick, how?"

Brooke explained that she had been to the doctor and made some exams and she had just gotten the results the day before and they weren't any good. She had a small tumor on her uterus that had caused some bleeding that she thought it was just her period getting screwed up. She went to the doctor a few days later and she diagnosticated the tumor. Brooke was scared at first and didn't want to take the test to know if the tumor was benign or malign. Instead, she tried to forget it for a while but with Haley's pregnancy and people thinking she was the one pregnant, it all came back to her when she started wondering if the tumor was really bad and she could never get pregnant, ever. That's when she told Mouth because she needed someone to tell her what to do and Mouth was always very loyal to her. And he did exactly as she hopped he'd do. He stood by her and told her to take the test, even though she didn't want to. She postponed it for a few weeks and then finally did it. But then she chickened out again and never came back to know the results of it. A few weeks later and Mouth gave her an ultimatum: either she went down to know the results of the exam or he'd start telling people about her. She knew he'd never do it, but she also knew he was desperately trying to help her. So she went to the doctor and heard the bad news.

Karen listened to the whole story in silence and holding Brooke's hand tightly on hers. Once the girl finished with her explanation, Karen got up from her seat and took another one beside Brooke, putting one arm around her shoulder and pulling her closer to a side hug, which Brooke let her do.

"Why did you keep all this to yourself for all this time?" she asked softly stroking her hair.

Brooke shook her head as the tears streamed down her face, "I couldn't… I couldn't tell anyone. I didn't even know how."

"But now you have" Karen gently broke the hug, pushing Brooke away from her enough for her to look into the girl's eyes with compassion, "I want you to know that I'm going to help you with whatever I can. I know you're scared, but you don't have to keep doing this alone anymore. OK? I'll even go with you to the doctor again if you need me to."

Brooke smiled in between the tears, whipping some of them away and whispered a thank you, "Thanks, Karen. It really does mean a lot to me" she shrugged a little embarrassed, "I guess I've never been used to trust in… moms" she added with a shy grin.

Karen nodded with a smile and hugged her again, "But you can trust this mom."

Right after their talk, Karen walked Brooke back to Lucas' room and in less than five minutes she was deep in sleep. Sharing her problem with Karen made her feel a little lighter and she could finally relax enough to fall asleep.

Brooke woke up at 7:30 and found Karen already up. She had set the table for breakfast but couldn't stay much because her new employee, the one who was supposed to start work that morning by being there first thing in the morning and opening the Café, was going to run late. Brooke assured Karen she'd be ok, she would just have some breakfast and then rush back to Rachel's so she could change before going to school. She was finishing her cup of coffee when the back door opened and Lucas walked in with his IPod on and holding his backpack on one of his hands. He was about to drop it on the kitchen table but he stopped midway when he realized Brooke was there.

"Hey" he was clearly confused, much to Brooke's amusement.

"Morning, Lucas" she got up to put the empty cup inside the sink before giving him a smile and walking back next to him, "Your mom told me you'd spend the night out."

"Yeah" he dropped the backpack on the table and opened the fridge to get a bottle of water, "I slept at Peyton's" he narrowed his eyes at her, curiously, "I'm sorry, but what are you doing here?"

"Having breakfast" she stated and seeing how he kept his narrow she added, "I spent the night. I drove your mom from Haley's after the party and we started talking, it got a little late, she offered me your room…" she was about to keep going but he interrupted her with a raise of his hand.

"Whoa, she offered you what?"

"Your room" she repeated like it was no big deal. Than she realized it probably was by the look on his face and couldn't help the grin that appeared on her face, "Don't worry. She tided it up before I walked in to make sure I didn't have to see anything too gross."

"There was nothing gross in my room" he defended himself 'til she started to giggle and he realized she was messing with him, "You're funny" he pointed at her while squinting.

She giggled a little more but then got serious, glancing at his backpack, "I, uh… I didn't know you and Peyton were-", she searched for a better term, "Sleeping over."

"We are" he took a seat and grabbed a bagel from the basket on the table, "Sleeping over" he explained and she let a sigh of realization out. They got quiet for a second and he frowned, "It's a little weird to talk about this with you. Isn't it?"

She shrugged, "It doesn't have to be" then she stared at him for a moment and then finally nodded, "Yeah, a little."

He smiled at her and then looked down, taking a bite of the bagel. She sighed loudly and clapped her hands together, grabbing her purse from the kitchen counter and putting it around her shoulder.

"Well, I have to go. Don't wanna be late for school" she said it with sarcasm and made him laugh. She smiled wider. It had been a while since the last time she made him laugh and it felt good to do it again, even though she knew it wouldn't last long.

She took one step on his direction but then stopped herself. It was her impulse to go kiss him goodbye, but then she remembered it wasn't her place to do that anymore. That thought lingered on her mind for a moment 'til she saw Lucas' face waiting for her next move. She took that step back and raised her hand in the air, barely moving it, as a wave. He felt the tension in the air but figured it was just because they were in the same room together as it had happened before every time they met since they broke up. He looked at her standing by the door with her hand in the air and with a smile on the corner of her lips and raised his own to respond the wave. She wiggled her fingers and he smiled, watching her turn around and leave.

* * *

The title is a song by The Fray.


	4. Lie To Me

_Thank you all for the wonderful reviews! You guys really make my day and your reviews keep me going and looking foreword to update more and more! Sorry it took me so long this time, I'm on my school break and I got a little busy with real life stuff for a while there, but I'm back now. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I can't wait to read what you guys thought about it. _

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"Stupid desks!" Haley cursed out loud. 

She wasn't as big as she claimed to be since she felt really bloated, but she was definitely bigger than her regular self. That's why when she got in class that morning, she chose the same seat she always did and could barely fit, much to her surprise. Her bump wasn't that big but was sticking out ahead of her and she had to squeeze herself to get in the desk. She slapped the thing a couple of times as she sat, making Nathan raise both eyebrows at her. She saw his look and raised one of her own.

"What? Don't look at me like I'm crazy."

"I'm not" he defended himself taking a seat on the desk next to hers, "I just think you're overreacting. The desks aren't out to get you, baby" he said softly as reaching out for her hand.

She shot him a look and took her hand back, crossing her arms and looking straight ahead. He sighed on his place and glanced over the door to see Peyton walking in. She was alone, which was odd lately, and he gave her a nod.

"Hey" he watched her stop in front of him, "Where's the better half?" he joked making her give him a dirty look.

"Is it just me or you're giving away your comic relief to anyone else other than your wife just because you think she's unstable with hormones?" Peyton asked faking a nice smile.

Haley immediately turned her attention to Nathan, "You think what now?"

Nathan wanted to kill Peyton right about then. She suffocated a laugh and walked past them, taking a sit behind Haley's desk. The girl was still staring at her husband who didn't know exactly what to answer.

"She's-she's just kidding, Hales. I teased her first, you heard it!"

Before Nathan could go on with his apologies, Peyton leaned foreword and poked Haley's back to make her turn around. She barely did so, due her growing bump, but managed to glance over her friend behind her.

"What?"

"Did you like the party last night? I hope we didn't leave too much of a mess for you to clean" Peyton gave a half smile, "I didn't even think of that 'til I got home."

"It's OK" Haley shook her head; "Brooke, Karen and I cleaned must of it. That is 'til Brooke got dizzy and Karen had to drive her home, then we left things for Nathan to finish it" she added with a kind smile to the boy next to her.

Haley could be confusing these days and Nathan wondered when he was going to be able to predict her next move like he did before. Peyton frowned at the hearing of the last half and shook her head a little.

"What do you mean, Brooke felt dizzy? She OK?"

"Yeah, I guess she was just tired from this last week. She planned the whole thing herself and was pretty busy with the decoration and the food, the drinks, the party gifts… then to top that she stayed to help clean, I guess it was just a bit much."

"Add these annoying papers for school" Nathan opened his notebook and glanced over the girls. Haley shot him another discouraging look that made him sunk on his seat. She had done it again!

The bell rang and soon the class was filled with the rest of the students missing for the class. Brooke got in later with Rachel and apologizing to the teacher. They took seats on the back of the class and whispered the whole time. Peyton turned around to glance over at them a couple of times, 'til Lucas slipped her a note to pay attention to class, or him, if she needed that much of distraction. She only chuckled and started paying attention to the class again.

---

Sitting on a table outside the school, Brooke, Rachel, Bevin and Mouth were chit chatting about the baby shower the night before. Mouth, being a boy, hadn't attended and was now being filled in with what happened by the girls. They were all talking at the same time, every time one of them started to tell a story, another one started too, overlapping the first one. Mouth could only laugh at that, seeing how the girls couldn't stop yapping not even to realize there was no way he could possibly follow that.

When they told the boy about Bevin's present, they all burst into laughs, with the exception of, well, Bevin herself. They were still laughing when Peyton walked next to them, holding some books on her hands. They raised their eyes to meet hers and slowly the talking stopped. Rachel glanced at Brooke and then sighed dramatically, standing up.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom. All this laughing made me wanna pee. Bevin?" she turned to the girl already walking ahead to be followed by her.

Mouth couldn't exactly follow the girls to the bathroom so he only scooched to the end of the bench. Brooke threw her hair behind her shoulder, smiling to Peyton who stopped in front of her with a half smile and one eye shut because of the bright sunlight.

"Hey."

"Hi!"

"So I was thinking, if you don't have anything else to do later tonight, we could hang out or something" Peyton shrugged, "You know… like we used to do, before-"

"Before what?" Brooke cut her trying to sound casual.

"Before things got this weird" she added and glanced around a little uncomfortable, but sighed trying not to show it, "And it doesn't have to be this way, Brooke. I'm not used to us being this way."

Brooke knew what she was talking about; she felt exactly the same way. But that didn't mean she was ready to admit that, especially not to Peyton. As much as she missed her best friend and all the time they used to spend together, the closeness they had, she couldn't go back there, not now. Not when she was trying to get enough space from her as she could before telling her what was happening. Brooke knew she'd have to tell Peyton about it, but she didn't know how. It would hurt her too much and if they were as close as they were before, it'd hurt herself even more.

"Oh, tonight?" she hesitated before shaking her head, "Sorry, I can't. I have plans with Rachel."

Peyton raised her eyebrows and then nodded, "Alright. We rain check then" she started to back away and waved, "Have fun" then turned to Mouth, "Bye, Mouth!"

"Bye!" Mouth waved back.

Brooke just watched her leave already regretting having lied to her.

---

After spending two hours at Karen's Café trying to convince his mom to take a break and go home, Lucas walked into his room, tired. He hadn't convinced her to come back with him, but he made her promise him she'd come back earlier and leave it up to the new guy to lock the place. He dropped his backpack next to the bed, on the floor and threw himself on the mattress. Sighing loudly, he rolled on the bed, to sink his face on his pillow and try to get some sleep, but something made him back away from the pillow for a moment and stare at it. It was her scent. He glanced around and closed his eyes remembering his encounter with Brooke in the kitchen earlier that day. She had spent the night on his bed and his mom hadn't been home yet to change the sheets so it was her scent he was feeling on his pillowcase. And on his sheet. He sat up straight and breathed, smelling her perfume all around his bedroom.

He leaned back on his headboard and held the pillow tight against his chest and taking a sniff. He felt partially guilty to be enjoying her being there without her actually being there, and especially because he had a girlfriend that wasn't her now. He slowly put the pillow aside, next to him on the bed and sighed, wondering if he should change the sheets himself or not. That thought didn't last long on his mind when it was interrupted by Peyton's presence on his doorway.

"Hey" he saw her walk in and take a seat at the edge of the bed, "You're early."

"Yeah, well" she threw her bag on the bed and sighed loudly, "Brooke blew me off."

He frowned and pushed the pillow further aside from him with a guilty conscious, "What?"

"I asked her if she wanted hang out tonight and she said she had plans with Rachel" Peyton pronounced Rachel's name with a certain reluctance. Not that she had anything personal against the girl – well, aside all the facts that made everybody else dislike her – but she was really bothered with the fact that she was now so much closer to Brooke than she was.

"Oh" Lucas tried to find out what was wrong with that and how was that blowing her off, so he only squinted, showing her he wasn't following.

"She lied" Peyton explained.

"How do you know?"

"I've known her my whole life, Lucas" she laid back on the bed, staring at the ceiling, "I know when she's lying to me. I just wish she'd let me in again, you know?"

"I know" Lucas nodded understandingly, "But you know Brooke, when she does that you can't push it, you just have to let her come back by herself."

Peyton turned her head to the side so she could look at him and stared for a while, before frowning and almost whispering, "Is it wrong to be jealous of how well you know her?"

"C'mon" he leaned foreword to lay on his stomach and reach out for her hand, "I know you, too" he smiled at her but she didn't smile back.

"Yeah, but you know her like I know her. You don't know me like she does."

"I don't?" he scanned her for a moment and then got closer, staring at her eyes, "What are you hiding?"

She rolled her eyes when she saw him smiling again and lightly hit him on the arm, "Lucas… I'm serious."

He sighed and took his hand back, plopping on his elbows so he could properly look at her, "What do you want me to say?"

"Nothing" she shook her head and suddenly sat up, reaching for her bag, "I gotta go."

He watched her got up and sat up, following her with his eyes, "I thought you were gonna stay tonight."

"About that" she stopped and turned around with one hand on her waist. She didn't want to argue with him but she knew she had to say it anyway, "I can't do this anymore, Luke…" she shrugged, "We sleep together but we don't really do anything-"

"You said you wanted to wait" he remembered her.

She nodded, "I do! But I think I wanna wait all together, you know? I'm not Haley nor are we eight… I can't just sleep with you."

He got serious for a while but then looked down, nodding, "OK. I was just trying not to push anything."

"You're not."

"I'll see you tomorrow?" he asked looking at her again.

She nodded and came back to him to place a kiss on his forehead, "Yeah. G'night."

He waited for her to leave the bedroom and sighed, glancing to his side to the pillow. He hesitated for a moment but then pulled the pillow off the pillowcase and started to pull the sheet out of the mattress to put it on the washing machine. He couldn't sleep with her presence when Peyton had just walked out on him.

---

Plopped on her bed Brooke was flipping through the pages of a fashion magazine when Rachel walked in from the bathroom all dressed up and putting on some earrings. Brooke lifted her eyes from the magazine to the girl in front of the mirror and raised one eyebrow with interest.

"Hot date?"

"Yeah" Rachel confirmed as finishing fixing her hair with her hands.

Brooke eyed her for a moment, closed her magazine and tossed it on the nightstand next to her before getting up and walking behind Rachel with her arms crossed, "Isn't this like the third guy in two weeks?"

Rachel turned around and shrugged, placing one hand on her hip, "Better than spending my night alone at home _brooking_ myself."

With a disgusted face, Brooke shut her eyes, shaking her head, "That is _not _what I'm gonna do!"

"Oh no? Then why would you tell Peyton you had plans with me when you don't if it's not to spend" she glanced at Brooke for a second, "Quality time with yourself?"

"That's… I…" Brooke hesitated a little before putting both hands on her waist, "How do you even know that?"

"Mouth told me" she walked past Brooke to her closet to search for a purse, "I asked him what he was doing tonight and he asked me if I wasn't going out with you."

Brooke made a face while following Rachel around, "Mouth is your hot date?"

Rachel simply shook her head while founding a purse to match her outfit, "No."

"Why would you ask what he was doing tonight, then?"

"Curiosity", she shrugged but then got serious, raising one eyebrow and staring at Brooke, "So why did you lie to Peyton?"

"I just didn't want to hang out with her" Brooke came back to her bed and took a seat, watching Rachel walking over to her with a curious look and stopping in front of the bed.

"Hm, thought it might be something more interesting" she walked back to the door, "But it's not so I'm gonna go, don't wait up!"

Brooke waved even though Rachel had already exited the bedroom and mumbled, "I wouldn't" before lying back on the bed, with her eyes closed and sighed.

About an hour and a half later, Brooke was still in bed and almost falling asleep of boredom. She didn't want to go out but she certainly didn't want to spend the night alone in her bedroom either, but she didn't seem to have much of a choice. She was starting to drift off when she heard a soft knock on her door and Mouth's head popping in with a plastic bag on his hands.

"Anyone home?"

"Mouth!" she sat up straight on a jump, "How did you get in here?"

He walked to her bed and took a seat by the edge of it and dropped the plastic bag next to him, "The door was open."

"Touching how Rachel's worried about my safety" she said it with sarcasm.

He chuckled and took out two DVD's from the bag and showed them to her, "I brought movies, I hope it's alright. Rachel told me you guys didn't actually have plans so I thought…"

"I'd be home alone and miserable?" Brooke finished the sentence for him.

He nodded, "Something like that."

She chuckled and reached out for the movies and started to read the back of them to decided which one they were gonna watch. Mouth just sat in silence as she read but then he couldn't hold his tongue anymore and sighed before starting to talk.

"So… when are you going back to the doctor?"

The question sent shivers down Brooke's spine. She stopped what she was doing and then slowly put the DVD's back on her lap, looking down, avoiding looking at Mouth's face.

"Mouth, I'd like us to just watch the movies for tonight, OK?"

"No, it's not OK" he shook his head, decided, "You may not want to talk about this but I do. You've been avoiding the doctor for the last few months and I haven't said anything, but you gotta start doing something…"

He was about to keep going on lecturing her but she stopped him when she raised her eyes to meet his.

"Monday" she whispered.

He stopped, confused, "What?"

"I talked to my doctor and I'll be starting the chemo on Monday" she tried to smile but couldn't. She just kept staring at him and swallowed hard, "Are you happy now?"

Mouth could see how much it took her to let those words out and even more to make the call and set up the chemo session. Brooke was only eighteen years old, head of the cheerleading squad, class president, owner of her own fashion line… she was anything but a quitter. She was strong, she practically raised herself without her parents around all the time and she was beautiful on Mouth's eyes. Not just because of her long auburn hair or her huge dimples, but because she was all that and still OK with accepting people just the way they were. She couldn't be sick. He repeated that to himself countless times after she told him and he knew she'd probably said that to herself, too. So admitting she had a problem and seeking help was more than she could to, but she did it anyway and he knew she'd need someone there for her while doing that.

"No" he whispered sadly, "I'd be happy if you didn't have to do this."

She nodded and looked down to her own fingers, "I know."

"But it's good to know you're getting help" he reached out for her hand, "You're gonna be good again, Brooke. I know it."

"I believe you" she tried to smile again when he squeezed her hand on his and before she could let the tears run free again, she sighed shaking her head, "Now can we, please, watch a movie?"

He smiled for her and nodded, "Sure. You pick!"

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	5. The Secret's Out

_I don't even have much to say, except for: thanks for the lovely reviews! You guys are the best. ;) I hope you enjoy this chapter as well._

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Back from work, Karen walked into her house and went straight to the living room. She sat on the couch and put her feet up on the coffee table, sighing as she felt her back relaxing. Carrying around a six months pregnant belly wasn't as easy as the first time. She ran her hand over her stomach when Lucas walked in from his bedroom, scratching the back of his head. 

"I thought I heard a noise."

"I just got home" she waited for him to take a seat on the coffee table in front of her to continue, "I wanted to rest before fixing something to eat."

"'I'll do that for you."

"Thanks" she smiled, looking around, "Where's Peyton? I thought she was gonna spend the night here."

He sighed and nodded, "She was, but she changed her mind."

"Can't say I'm disappointed" she chuckled but then came around, "I'm sure you two are very responsible but I don't feel comfortable with you being responsible in my house."

"Mom" he made a face. He wasn't used to having that kind of conversation with his mother, "We don't…" he shook his head, "It's not like that with me and Peyton. Not yet anyway."

"It's not?" she asked suspiciously but saw how Lucas was being honest, "Oh… I thought that since with Brooke was like that… well, constantly, that it was with Peyton, too."

"Yeah" he nervously chuckled and shook his head again, wishing she'd drop the subject, "But no."

"Is everything OK with you and Peyton?"

"Yeah, we're fine" he sighed and then glanced at his mother's belly, "How are you and the baby?"

"We're fine, too."

"When it's your next doctor appointment? I wanna go with you."

"Lucas, I know you mean well but you don't have to. I just have to learn to be on my own" she patted her bump again, with proud.

"But you don't need to" Lucas got up from the coffee table and took a seat on the couch next to Karen, "I'm gonna be here for you, always."

"Always?" she repeated with uncertain, "OK, what happens when you get married and move out?"

He shrugged, "I'll just get married and live here."

She nodded, amused, "Peyton won't mind?"

Lucas caught his breath for a moment and leaned back on the couch, getting away from Karen. He sighed and shrugged, "I never thought of getting married. To Peyton."

"Oh" she saw how uncomfortable he got, "I just figured you did… I guess boys and girls are different. We always think of those things when we're in a relationship."

"Well, I did" he started a little unsure, "Once or twice… when I was with Brooke. First when she thought she was pregnant and then on Keith's almost wedding" he stopped himself when he saw the look on Karen's face at the mention of Keith's name. He slowly got closer to her again and whispered, "I shouldn't have brought his name up."

"It's OK" she took his hand reassuring, "I have to get used to it, right?"

"Is it OK for me to feel bad for the baby?" he asked while glancing over her bump, "I mean, he or she won't know Keith like I did."

"Yes" she smiled kindly, "It is not OK to feel sorry for her though."

Lucas stopped for a moment and only blinked for a couple of times, watching Karen's expression. She had a smirk on her face when she saw he'd realized. He frowned and leaned foreword.

"Her? You didn't use 'or him'. Is it…" he didn't finish the question, "It's a girl? I'm gonna have a baby sister?" Karen nodded and he put both hands over her bump, "Mom!"

"I just found out this morning" Karen put one hand over her bump as well, enjoying Lucas' enthusiasm.

"I can't believe this" he leaned over the bump and whispered to it, "Hey, baby girl. It's your big brother Luke" he rubbed the bump for a moment and felt like bubbles moving inside of it. He quickly backed away, taking his hand with him, "Oh my God. Did you feel it?"

"She is inside of me, yeah" she chuckled. Karen knew Lucas was excited with her pregnancy but she hadn't seen him lighted up like that before.

"Is it the first time?" he asked putting his hand back on where it was, trying to feel the baby movement again.

"No, she's moved before. You know" she started while savoring the first brother-sister bond, "Keith was the first one who felt you kicking, even before me."

He looked up to her confused, "How is that possible?"

"He came over one night, when I was pregnant with you, for dinner. He had been such a great friend, helping me out on any way he could… I wanted to give him something back. But I was so tired of working all day carrying you with me that I fell asleep on the couch after dinner, so he came with a blanket to put over me and touched my stomach to wish you a goodnight and" she shrugged with a teary smile, "You kicked, for the first time. He was so full of himself when he told me he actually said you already liked him better than me."

Lucas smiled back, rubbing the back of her hand, "Sounds like Keith."

"He loved you so much" she caressed his cheek, gently; "I know he would've loved this baby, too."

Leaning over to Karen, Lucas pulled her to a hug, "I'll just have to love her for the both of us, then."

---

It was almost night time on a Sunday when Nathan started to make dinner. He didn't exactly have many cooking skills – or at all for what it mattered – but Haley had bought him a cook book so he could attempt something on his free time. Since Haley was moody because of the uncontrolled hormones lately, Nathan thought it'd be nice to try and make dinner for them for a change and give his wife a break. So there he was, figuring how to make soup. Shouldn't be too difficult, probably just cut some vegetables and some chicken and throw it all on a big pan with some water. He was reading the book again to see how far ahead he already was – no where near – when he heard Haley's yell.

"Nathan!"

"What?" he yelled back going towards her on their bedroom. He walked in and saw her by their bed, with the mattress half on the bed and half out. She was clearly struggling to try to lift it. "Haley, what are you doing?"

"Flipping the mattress" she explained out of breath as he walked next to her and pushed her aside, taking up from where she was.

He lifted the mattress up and flipped to the other side, placing it back on the bed, "Why?"

"So we use it evenly and it doesn't get all bumpy" she turned around to grab the folded clean set of sheets she had on the armchair and started to unfold to spread on the bed.

"Are you trying to pull a muscle?" he asked seeing how she hadn't stop moving, "You're not supposed to lift weight or do too much exercise anyway. Why didn't you ask me to do it before?"

As she put the new pillowcases on the pillows, she shot him a look, "Because I'm pregnant, I'm not helpless!"

He stopped by the bed, with his hands on his hips watching her change the sheets. She didn't even notice him standing there, just kept doing whatever she thought she should. Nathan noticed how small she looked, smaller actually, now that her bump was getting bigger everyday. It was like as the bump got bigger, she got smaller herself. She was fragile and inconstant and he couldn't help want to protect her constantly despite the fact she insisted she didn't need any special treatment at the moment.

The doorbell rang and snapped Nathan from his thoughts. Haley mumbled for him to get the door while she was off to change the toilet paper roll on their bathroom. He shook his head before exiting the room and headed towards the living room. He opened the door and saw the small brunette with her hands on her jeans' back pockets and a small smile on her face.

"Hey, Brooke" he smiled back at her.

"Hey, Nathan. Can I come in?"

"Sure" he stepped aside for her to enter. He closed the door behind them and followed her to the couch where she stopped and turned around to face him.

"Where's Haley?"

"Flipping the mattress" he pointed towards the bedroom.

Brooke frowned, "What?"

"Nathan, we're out of toilet paper…" Haley's voice was loud when she came from the bedroom 'til she noticed Brooke standing in the middle of the living room. She stopped and opened a smile, walking again to hug her friend, "Hey, Brooke! What are you doing here?"

"Hey…" she hugged her back for a moment but then broke the hug, sighing, "I kinda need to talk to you" she turned to Nathan, "Both of you" she turned back to Haley, "Do you have any time now?"

"Sure" Haley wrapped one arm around Brooke's shoulder, leading her to the couch and taking a seat next to her. Nathan followed them and sat on the coffee table, in front of them two.

Brooke took a deep breath, glancing from one to the other, "Well… I need to tell you something but it's not something easy to say, so I'll need you to let me finish. Is that OK?"

Nathan and Haley exchanged looks and then nodded at the same time, "Yeah."

"Of course" Haley nodded one more time, "What is it?"

"OK" Brooke took a deep breath.

She noticed Haley's anxious expression and the wrinkle on Nathan's forehead. They were both looking at her with an expectation so big that suffocated her a little. She glanced down at Haley's pregnant bump and saw how the girl had one hand over it. It was killing her to be there, sitting on their living room couch about to give the worst news possible for the moment. Haley was pregnant, she was hormonal and she didn't need any stress. But she was also Brooke's current best friend. She told Brooke she was pregnant before she told anyone else, before she even thought of telling Nathan or Lucas – who was supposed to be Haley's best friend. Even though Brooke really didn't want to tell her, she knew she had to. She thought of telling Haley alone, but considering her mood swings in the past few weeks and how anything would set her off crying, she figured it'd be better if she told her with Nathan's presence. She'd have to tell him eventually as well so it'd be better to tell them both at the same time.

"God, this really isn't easy" Brooke sighed heavily after a while. She was trying to find the right words to break the news, if there were such words, "I'm… not well" she started slowly, "And I haven't been for a while now, but I will be. Hopefully."

Haley's hand danced around her bump for a moment. She knew Brooke didn't want interruptions but she needed more information than that, "What are you talking about?"

"I'm sick" Brooke blunted out suddenly, surprising the couple and herself, "I have a, uh… a small mass thing on my uterus that can't be treated with surgery so I'll have to do a long term treatment" she tried to simplify as much as she could.

"What kind of treatment?" Haley asked again, her voice with much more concern than before. Her free hand hung from the couch and Nathan reached out of it, taking on his own.

Brooke watched them holding hands and slowly lifted her eyes to meet Haley's. She hesitated for a moment and glanced down at her own hands, "Chemotherapy" she pronounced it quietly.

"You mean…" Nathan chocked up on his words, "You have cancer?"

The sound of the last word hit Brooke like a brick. She never actually thought of that term specifically. Neither had her doctor used that word, sensing how Brooke kept avoiding it at all times. Not even Mouth or Karen said it, but now he did. As much as she wanted to avoid it, she couldn't anymore. It was real.

"No" Haley denied it first, shaking her head with her eyes filling with tears.

Brooke bit her under lip and nodded weakly, "Yeah."

"No" Haley kept shaking her head, "But you can't…"

"Haley" Brooke interrupted her and took her other hand to hold it in some kind of comfort, "I had to tell you because I'll be starting the treatment on Monday and there are some side effects, so… I thought I should tell you two. Especially after you asked me to be your baby's Godmother and all."

The three of them suddenly fell into silence. Nathan and Haley were still trying to grasp the information Brooke had given them and she was trying to digest the c-word. Nathan got up from his seat and took one next to Haley, to wrap one arm around her since she started to cry.

"Who else knows about this?" he asked trying to make Brooke talk and keep her from crying too. He didn't think he could handle the two of them crying at the same time and keep himself from doing that as well.

"Mouth and Karen" she took a deep breath to contain her tears, "Mouth was the first to know and Karen – I needed a grownup to help me through it, I guess."

"Your parents don't know?"

She shook her head, "I still couldn't figure a way to tell them. You know, over the phone is not the best way to do it" she stopped and saw Haley still crying. She had both hands covering her face as she sobbed. Brooke reached out for her, "Haley… are you OK?"

"I'm just…" she sobbed without being able to stop, "No. Brooke…"

She started crying all over again and leaned to hug Brooke who took her into her arms, pulling her closer and tighter. Haley cried on Brooke's shoulder for a while as Brooke stroke her hair, trying to calm her down. Nathan got up and went to get his wife a glass of water. He came back with the water and Brooke broke the hug, still holding Haley's arms.

"It's gonna be OK, honey."

Haley sniffed, wiping her tears away with the back of her hand, "Why are you consoling me? I should be consoling you."

"It's OK" Brooke forced a teary smile, "I'm not crying."

Haley smiled back, still wiping the tears, "Me neither!"

They both chuckled for a moment and hugged again, quickly. Brooke wiped the single tear that managed to stream down her face and sighed, putting on a brave face.

"Thanks, you guys."

"We're here for whatever you need, Brooke" Nathan took a seat next to her and gently rubbed her shoulder with an encouraging smile.

"Yeah" Haley nodded agreeing, "You know you can count on us, right?"

"I know" Brooke nodded, too, sighing in relief.

It hurt more than she expected to tell them that, but at the same time she felt a little lighter. She wasn't alone; she had her friends with her now. She just needed to figure out a way to tell the rest of them. The hardest part was yet to come.

* * *


	6. Shades of Gray

_So sorry for the huge delay in updating here, but I got stupid writer's block and then college stuff got in the way and I kinda forgot to come here. Sorry again! Your last reviews rocked and here's another quick update. Pinky swear I'll update again by next week! _

* * *

When Brooke Davis was little she used to think her mood controlled the weather. Like, if she woke happy there would be a bright shining sun outside with a clear sky. If she was feeling childish, the sun was going to be occupying the sky with funny shaped clouds. And whenever she was feeling mad, there would be thunder and lightening. 

The weather outside the hospital's windows was definitely matching Brooke's mood at the moment. It was raining weak drops of water with a cold breeze harmonizing with the grey cloudy sky above. Sitting on the hospital declinable chair, Brooke stirred a little, feeling her empty stomach turn in a knot. The doctor had told her she was going to experiment some nausea or feel dizzy for the next couple of hours, so it was best if she had some rest in the recovering room. Lying on the declinable chair, she rested her head with her eyes closed, hoping the bad feeling would go away faster. She heard some footsteps by the door, but figuring it was just another nurse, she kept her eyes closed.

"Hey, Davis."

The familiar voice made her open her eyes and roll her head to the side at the door's direction. She smiled when acknowledged who it was. He was probably one of the last people she'd hope to see by that door.

"Scott, what are you doing here?"

"I figured you'd play the tough card and come alone" Nathan walked next to her chair and took a seat by the one beside it, "You really shouldn't."

"I know that now" she bitterly referred to the annoying knot on her stomach that was now crawling towards her throat, despite her efforts to keep it down, "Where's Tutor Mom?"

Nathan smiled unconsciously, "Sleeping like a rock ever since she started her second trimester." He wasn't really good with pep-talking, at least not if it wasn't to his basketball team, "How you doing?"

Brooke glanced down, taking one hand to the pit of her stomach and frowning painfully, "Pretty crappy right now. The doctor said that's normal" she tried to shrug.

"It's not" his voice came out on a whisper. He noticed her reaction and then it hit him. She wasn't playing tough by being there by herself; she didn't want to prove she could do this alone. She couldn't. She just didn't want people to see her suffering or feeling bad for her, like he was. "Unless you're Dan Scott's kid" he added trying to light up the mood.

It worked for half a second, when she smirked but then got back to her painful expression. He leaned closer to her and she reached out for his hand. He grabbed it and gave it a squeeze, with a comforting smile.

"I didn't wanna be alone" she admitted.

He nodded understandingly, "That's why I'm here for."

Brooke sighed a little more relieved. There was someone by her side now, watching over her, so she just closed her eyes again and tried to relax and maybe the awkward feeling would go away. Nathan kept holding her hand and wondering at the same time if he wasn't the wrong Scott to be doing that. After a while, when Brooke opened her eyes again and smiled to let him know she was starting to feel better, he attempted to ask her.

"I gotta ask" he started carefully, "When are you going to tell Peyton and Lucas about this?"

She moved on her spot to sit up straight again, feeling the nauseous feeling fading away and shrugged at Nathan's question, "I don't know. I guess soon… I wish I didn't have to tell people anymore."

"Then I'm guessing you didn't tell Rachel either" he observed with some humor, "Otherwise the whole school would've known by now."

She smiled back for a moment but then shook her head, "Rachel's a good friend. But I haven't told her yet."

There were so many people yet to find out about her that Brooke started to wonder if she'd have the strength to tell them all. No, she definitely wouldn't. It was just too much of an emotional rollercoaster that she had to go through every time she'd tell someone and she didn't think she could take it. Nathan seemed to have noticed her inner struggle when he got up from his seat.

"You look tired. You should get some more rest. I'm gonna find myself a donut or something and I'll be right back, OK?"

She nodded, thankfully, "Alright."

---

Later at school, Brooke came in late for the last two classes. She could've skipped that school day all together but she figured it'd do more good to her if she went to classes than if she stayed home alone and leaving her mind to wander. After the last class, she got her backpack and was walking through the patio when she heard Peyton's voice coming from behind her, making her stop to turn around.

"Hey!"

"Hi" Brooke replied the girl's smile with her own.

"You OK?" Peyton asked with a concern voice.

Brooke forced the smile again and shrugged, "Yeah. Why?"

"You missed the English test on first period."

"Oh" Brooke breathed in a small relief and nodded, "I lost the time."

Watching the girl's reaction, Peyton squinted and then crossed her arms against her chest. She could always see when Brooke was lying but she usually could also see the reason, unlike now.

"Huh" she huffed.

"What?"

"I asked Rachel about you and she didn't know where you were. You'd think she'd know since you two share a bedroom."

Caught in the lie, Brooke glanced around, taking a deep breath and also buying some time to come up with her next one. She looked back at her friend standing in front of her and for a second she wondered if she could keep up with that. Lying to her best friend.

"She didn't spend the night at home."

Before Peyton could look into any further, Mouth showed up walking towards them with a smile on his face. He stopped in front of the girls, greeting them.

"Hey."

"Hi, Mouth!" Brooke stepped ahead to stop beside him.

"Hi, Brooke" he quickly glanced over to Peyton and gave her a nod, turning his attention back to the brunette girl next to him, "Can I talk to you? About something…" he looked again at Peyton, awkwardly.

Taking the hint, Peyton just nodded, "I'll see you later" and walked away from them.

Watching the blonde girl walk away, Brooke's face melted for a moment when she sighed tiredly. Mouth saw it and frowned.

"What was that?"

"She's getting suspicious" Brooke started to walk to the bench a couple feet away from them, followed by the boy, "I hate lying to her."

They took a seat next to each other and Mouth shrugged, "Then tell her."

"I can't" she shook her head rapidly, "It's complicated…" she failed to explain to the boy why she couldn't tell her best friend about something so huge that was happening to her. She couldn't begin to express the sick feeling she got every time she thought about telling Peyton the truth after being with the girl through all of her life's dramas. No, she couldn't be the one to add one more. She knew too well what that could do.

"So" she started again, changing the subject, "You wanted to talk to me?"

"Yeah" Mouth moved on his seat and glanced around before toning it down, "How was it today?"

"Awful" she tried to smile to light up the mood, but couldn't, "I went alone –"

"You could've called me" he interrupted her to let her know he was there for her, no matter what.

She finally managed to smile, acknowledging that, "But then Nathan showed up and told me I shouldn't do this alone. And he was right, I shouldn't."

"I could go with you. You know, next time."

Brooke squeezed his hand, gently, "Thanks, Mouth. What would I do without you?"

He smiled cockily, "Helplessly try to find your reason in life."

She laughed at him and he laughed along. It has been a while since he last saw her laughing like that, unaware of the burden she was carrying by herself and avoiding to share with anyone else. Not that she had to, she had a lot of people there for her, but the ones who could truly make a difference, she was still keeping away from her.

---

Lying on her stomach on the bed, Rachel had her laptop open and was typing a response email to her parents when she saw Brooke walking in the bedroom. She glanced up for a second and then turned back to the screen in front of her. She waited for Brooke to walk in the closet to drop her jacket on the hanger to start speaking.

"Do I get to know why you went MIA?"

"No" Brooke replied boredly and dropped herself on her bed, "I'm so tired."

Rachel finished typing the email, closed the laptop and got up from her bed, fixing her hair, "Brooke, we need to talk."

"Does it have to be now?" the girl asked with her eyes closed, "I'm really tired, Rachel."

"Yeah" she ignored Brooke's plead and plopped herself on the girl's bed, making her open her eyes and raise her head to see her. Rachel sighed quickly and broke the news, "My parents called and asked me to go spend some time with them before the end of the school year."

That was enough to make Brooke jump on the bed and sit up straight, "Why?"

"Who knows, guilty conscious or whatever" she shrugged it off, "The thing is, I have to go. At least if I want them to keep paying for my expensive rich girl life style. But you don't have to worry, you can stay here and house sit for me 'til I'm back" she finished up with a teasing tone that made Brooke roll her eyes.

Sighing to have time to sink in the news, Brooke tucked some hair behind her ear, "I don't know what to say. When are you leaving?"

"Next Friday."

"Already?" Brooke gasped, "God, I..."

"And you can invite someone to stay with you" Rachel interrupted, surprising the girl.

Brooke cracked a smile, "Thanks, but I'm used to be by myself."

"But you shouldn't" Rachel's expression suddenly got serious and Brooke felt a shiver down her spine. For this girl to be serious it had to be something bad, "Especially not now. I know, Brooke" she took a moment to let the other girl realize what she was talking about; "I found your exams a few days ago."

Momentarily speechless, Brooke closed her eyes for a second and shook her head, "You did?" she opened them again to stare at Rachel, "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I figured you'd tell me when you were ready" she shrugged and then tilted her head, "But since I'm going away…"

Brooke nodded, understandly. They kept staring at each other for a moment or two, when Brooke's eyes filled with tears. She was much more emotional these last couple of days. Leaning forward, she pulled her roommate to a hug.

"I'm gonna miss you."

Rachel hugged her back and breathed heavily, to remain collected, "You better get well soon so we can party when I come back!"

Brooke chuckled and broke the hug, "You bet."

* * *


	7. Over My Head

_Yes, I know I said a week and it was more than that. So I lied and now I'm ashamed. To try and make it up to you guys, I merged the next two chapters into one and here it is! Sorry again, I'll try and behave next time. Hee!_

* * *

It was almost dawn and the Café was getting packed with people having coffee and bagels. Lucas was sitting on a stool by the counter while Karen was behind it, pouring coffee on a couple of mugs that were to be served. The boy had an open book that he had been reading for the last twenty minutes, since he got there. Karen had served him a muffin and a cup of chocolate milk that he reluctantly accepted, arguing he wasn't six anymore. After handing the coffee mugs to the waiter, Karen picked up a cloth to dry some of the dishes and walked next to her son. 

"Have you heard from Brooke lately?"

"I saw her at school today" he finished reading the last line of the page and looked up, "Why?"

"No reason" Karen shrugged, picking up another dish, "Just haven't heard you talking about her in a while."

Lucas frowned, "She spent the night at our house three days ago."

"I know" she walked away to put the set of dishes back on the shelf and came back, "But have you? Talked to her?"

"I talked to her that morning" he shook his head, slightly confused, "Mom, is everything OK?"

"Yeah" Karen forced a grin, "Everything's fine."

He watched his mother take the same cloth she was using to dry the dishes and use it to clean the counter with small circle movements. He frowned again, knowing something was wrong and that his mother was probably hiding something from him.

"Why are you asking me all these questions about Brooke?"

Karen kept on cleaning as she responded without looking at her son, "I had a dream about her, last night. And I got worried, that's all. It's silly."

"Alright" he nodded, not really convinced at all. Something was definitely off when Karen put the plates back on the mugs' shelf. Lucas knew if she hadn't told him what was it by then, she wouldn't tell him at all even if he insisted. So he closed his book and got up, "You know what, mom? I have some things to do but I'll stop by later to help you close up. OK?"

Karen nodded, forcing a silly smile, "OK. I'll see you later."

---

The photo album was starting to get blurred with the tears that kept on dropping on the pictures. Brooke wiped some of them off with the back of her hands. She was silently crying, just with some tears streaming down her face. Glancing over the photos, she stopped on a page that had one of the whole cheerleading squad plus the team mascot posing together. She was standing next to the mascot with a perky smile on her face. All the other girls seemed to be having the same fun as she was. On the photo below it was her with one arm wrapped around Haley's shoulder, both of the girls striking a pose to the camera on Brooke's hand. She remembered she had a hard time holding the camera still and posing for the picture at the same time, but somehow she managed to make it. The next page had a picture of Bevin and Rachel smiling at cheer practice and below it there was one of her and Peyton together. Brooke was smiling with one hand on her hip and Peyton was making a face showing one thumb up. Brooke couldn't help the smile on her face at the memory of that day.

She was getting nostalgic and she hated that. Telling her best friend about her illness was something she couldn't avoid, but she would for as long as she could make it. It was only going to cause an unnecessary stress on the girl, one that Brooke knew too well she had gone through before. But then there was Lucas. She had to tell him eventually too, but she didn't really want to. Since he was always hanging out with Peyton lately, it shouldn't be hard to avoid an honest one-a-one conversation with him.

"Brooke?" the boy's voice made Brooke jump on the bed, taking one hand over her heart.

"Lucas?" she asked on a whisper. It was too freaky that she was thinking of avoiding him and there he was all of the sudden, "What are you doing here?" she caught her breath again, closing the photo album.

He walked in, a little uncomfortable with his hands on his pockets, "You missed English test, I came to check on you."

"Uh, I'm OK" she lied getting up and putting a pleasant smile on her face, "As you can see. I just lost time. But I talked to Mr. Harrison and I'll take the test next class."

"Alright" he smiled awkwardly nodding, "So everything's fine."

"Yeah" she confirmed one more time.

Seeing the pleasant smile slowly fade from Brooke's lips, Lucas narrowed his eyes down at her, taking one step closer to properly observe her, "Are you sure?"

"No…" she whined, dropping herself on the bed again and pouting, "Rachel's leaving. Her parents called and told her to go be with them for a while."

Not knowing exactly what to say, Lucas took a seat next to her on the bed. Ever since Rachel first walked into their lives, she had caused nothing but trouble. But recently she took Brooke in and gave her a some form of home and the girls were close friends now, as oppose to the mortal enemies they once were.

"Do you have to leave here?" he asked on a lack of better thing to say.

Brooke shook her head looking down, "No, she told me I could stay, but…" she lifted her eyes to meet his and gave a small shrug, "I don't wanna be alone."

He sighed slightly shaking his head and a smile appeared on his face, "You're not alone. You've got friends" he stared at her for a moment and took her hand on his, "You've got me."

She responded his smile with another and patted his hand with her free one, "Thanks, Lucas" and quickly retracted both hands to cover her face as the tears started to surface, "God! I'm such a girl!"

Lucas laughed amused as she started to wave both hands in front of her face, looking up to stop the tears from coming down her cheek, "Tell you what: I'm gonna take you for some ice cream and I bet you'll feel better in no time."

Her eyes immediately lighted up. Not because he was taking her out, but because it was ice cream!

"Really?"

He nodded satisfied with her reaction, "Yeah! I told you, you're not alone."

But that last sentence reminded her again he was – in fact – taking her out. She forced another smile that barely came out. She wasn't sure if she should be doing this, hanging out with him when he was with Peyton and when she was hiding something from him. She wasn't sure if she could do that without sinking in guilt. But his eyes were so full of hope, hope that he was helping and doing well, that she couldn't turn him down.

"OK" she agreed after a lot of hesitation, "Let me get my jacket."

---

The Riverwalk was a very family place to hang out, especially on afternoons and weekends. The sun was starting to go down and soon would get dark, but people were still happily enjoying ice creams, cotton candies and snacks with their families on the restaurants and cafés by the river-walk. Lucas and Brooke were sitting on a couple of stools on a high table in front of an ice cream parlor. Brooke had a huge cup of chocolate ice cream in front of her and was having no problems on digging up. Lucas was sitting in front of her, just watching how fiercely she ate that.

"Hmm, God!" she almost moaned, "How can creamy chocolate make me feel _so_ much better about myself and life in general?"

He laughed and then shrugged, "I'm just glad it worked."

She stopped the spoon filled with cream half way to her mouth and put it back inside the cup to glance over the table and smile to the boy, "Thanks again, Luke."

"Wasn't a problem" he reassured her.

"So…" she started digging again, "How are you?"

He saw her taking a heavily filled spoon to her mouth and nodded, "Enjoying my banana split" he spooned his own ice cream to make his point, "And you?"

She kept staring down at her sundae and mumbled, "I'm good."

Lucas made a face, "That bad, huh?"

"No, it's just that life's being…" she shrugged choosing the right word, "Slow, lately" she waited for him to nod in understand and then took another filled spoon to her mouth, "It's been a while since we talked about life and stuff."

"Yeah" he dropped his spoon inside the banana split and folded both arms on the table to look at her, "I missed it."

"Really?" she tried not to blush, "Me too. So, how's the misses?" she asked on a mocking tone.

"OK, that was weird" he restarted to fuss with his ice cream.

"It is, isn't it? But it shouldn't have to be, right?" she asked really hoping he'd agree with her or else she wouldn't know what to say. If they were all going to be friends they should be comfortable enough to talk about each other.

"Theoretically no, buy then again…" he shrugged again, looking down, "I don't think I'd feel comfortable talking about your boyfriends either."

Brooke smiled unconsciously pleased, "See you got it easy because I don't have boyfriends."

"C'mon" he looked at her suspiciously, "How's that possible?"

"I don't know! It's just not easy to find an honestly good, caring, loving guy anymore. They're either too friendly, like Mouth, or too taken…" she stopped herself before she said something she'd regret. He seemed to notice when she stuffed herself with sundae again, to change the subject.

But he went on, holding a smile, "Like Nathan?"

"You just read right through me!" Brooke shook her head.

They kept on talking and laughing for about two other minutes before Peyton showed up next to them and stopped beside Lucas, placing one hand over his shoulder and glancing to the two of them with a smile.

"Hey, guys. What are you doing?"

"Having fat sent straight to our thighs" Brooke clarified with amusement. For the first time in a very long time it wasn't weird being around the two of them as a couple.

"Hers, actually" Lucas corrected her, "I put on my hips."

The girls laughed together and Peyton took a seat next to Lucas, "Can I join you?"

"Sure!"

"Yeah, what do you want?" Lucas asked handing her the menu that was on the table.

"I actually just had lunch" Peyton explained eyeing his bowl of ice cream, "But your banana split looks tempting."

"Here" Lucas took a spoon full and took it to Peyton's mouth.

Brooke watched them together and just like the good feeling of being around them as a couple came, it faded away at that sight. She placed the spoon back on the cup and reached out for her purse hanging from the back of the stool she was sitting on.

"I should go" and when they both glanced at her, she explained, "I gotta go meet Haley, she's gonna help me with my History paper. So, I'll see you guys later."

"OK" Lucas agreed with a nod.

"Alright."

"Thanks for the sundae, Luke" she quickly smiled at him and then at Peyton, "Bye, P. Sawyer."

The girl lifted her hand for a wave, "Bye, Brooke."

---

Even though the Haley excuse was fake, Brooke still went to her house anyway. She needed someone she could talk to, someone she didn't have to keep secrets from. They talked about her first session that morning, after Haley insisted a lot, but then they started talking about Lucas and Peyton again. Both girls were in the bedroom, sitting on the bed and folding baby clothes. Haley had gotten a bunch of them already and was now organizing them on the new baby dresser Nathan bought it for her.

"You should've seen them together" Brooke started, folding a light blue baby sweater and placing in on the top of the warm clothes pile, "Sharing a banana split, they were practically a Kodak commercial" she sighed heavily, grabbing a tiny pair of baby shoes and holding them on the palm of her hands, "I just don't know how to tell them. I _don't_ wanna tell them."

Haley kept listening carefully and understood where she was going with that. But she also knew that wasn't right. She put the little leather jacket, Peyton got the baby two weeks before, on the 'diverse' pile, "But you have to. Do you really want them living on their fantasy land, not knowing what's going on with you? Besides, Rachel's gonna be gone soon and you're gonna be by yourself on that big house. If you tell Peyton she might actually move in with you."

At the suggestion, Brooke shrugged, "I know. But then I'd have to deal with her and Lucas together constantly" she chuckled, bitterly, "No, thanks."

"So what?" Haley didn't get her tone, "I thought you were OK with them together."

"I am!" Brooke reassured with a high pitch and then came back to her normal husky voice, "I just don't wanna be the third wheel."

"I don't think that's gonna happen" Haley tried to calm her down, placing the last piece of baby clothe on the piles, "All done!" she smiled proudly, picking up a pile on her hands and going to the dresser, "Thanks for the help."

"Don't be silly, I'm practicing for when he's born" Brooke handed her another pile when she finished putting that one on the drawer, "I'm gonna be around a lot, just so you know, to spoil and smooch him at every opportunity I get. I can even imagine his chubby yummy little baby feet!"

Laughing at the girl's enthusiasm, Haley put both hands up in surrender, "OK! You're never babysitting, ever."

Brooke opened her mouth in disbelief, "Haley! Don't be mean!"

Still laughing, Haley threw a baby sock at Brooke's head, making the girl duck on the bed. She was about to throw the sock back at her when they both heard the front door opening and Nathan's voice coming from the living room.

"Babe, I'm home!" Nathan's voice was loud so they could clearly hear in the bedroom.

"We're in the bedroom, sweetums!" Brooke shouted back all perky, making Haley giggle.

Nathan stepped in the bedroom and saw both girls together, "Oh, hey Brooke."

"Brooke's telling me how she's planning on kill our baby by eating him after he's born" Haley informed, closing the bottom drawer.

Getting a look from Nathan, Brooke retracted herself on the bed, putting both hands over her heart and shaking her head, faking being hurt.

"Am not! I'm just gonna nibble his baby feet a little."

Nathan glanced at Haley who was still by the dresser, holding her laugh and nodded to Brooke, "You're never babysitting my kid."

"Told you!" Haley teased.

Brooke pouted, "I hate you both."

---

A couple of days passed by and it was the night before Rachel's departure. The gang decided to gather at her house for a goodbye movie session, since it was a school night and they couldn't exactly party all night long. Everybody was there already, in the living room, trying to decide what movie to watch. Rachel was with Brooke and Mouth in the kitchen, setting the food and drinks. Pouring potato chips from a big bag into an even bigger bowl, Brooke smirked all proud of herself and announced cheerily.

"Chips are ready!"

Rachel placed one last bottle of beer on top of the counter and reached out for the sink cabinet to take a small bag of juice powder, "I got us beer and pineapple juice for the knocked up girl."

"Actually, can you make it two juices?" Mouth filled a jar with water, "My dad finally borrowed me his car so I really can't mess it up."

"Sure, Mr. Dangerous" Rachel mocked him while pouring the powder on the jar.

Brooke glanced at the tempting bottles of beer and made a face, "Make that three. I shouldn't drink under heavy medication."

"Right" Rachel sighed dramatically, "Tell you what, I'll make a big jar and you guys have whatever you want."

"Good!"

"Thanks" Brooke winked, grabbing the bowl of chips, "I'm taking the chips!"

She skipped in the living room where Nathan, Haley, Lucas, Peyton, Skills and Bevin were spread around and chit chatting. She walked among the couches and placed the bowl of chips in the middle of the coffee table.

"Here we go!"

"What movies are we watching?" Bevin was sitting by the edge of her seat on the couch, trying to reach for the DVD selection lying by the bowl.

Lucas saw her picking up one or two of her choice and announced to the room, "That's still to be decided!"

"Weren't we watching the Jackie Chan movie?" Skills peeked over Bevin's shoulder and made a face at the teen movies she had on her hands.

Brooke took a seat on the arm of the couch, next to Haley, and shook her head, "I'm not watching that."

"Why not?" Peyton asked on a pleading tone, "It's Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker kicking ass!"

"That's exactly why!" Brooke stuck her tongue out.

Haley glanced around the room and then looked up to Brooke by her side, "Hey, where's the popcorn?"

"Nowhere?" Brooke forced a grin and then pointed to the bowl, "I made chips!"

Nathan raised one eyebrow, "You _made_ chips?"

"Alright, I got a bag, tore it open and put them on a bowl" Brooke rolled her eyes and then twitched her eyebrows almost pouting, "That still counts as personal effort."

"But I want popcorn."

"Me too" Bevin joined her, "What's a movie session without popcorn?"

Mouth walked in holding four bottles of beer at the same time, trying not to drop any of them, "I got beers!", the boys started clapping and all reached out for a bottle as Mouth handed to them.

"Now we're talking" Skills smiled happily.

Lucas stretched his hand in the air to grab one, "Thanks, man."

With her beer on her hand Peyton took a sip and frowned, "Where's Rachel?"

"In the kitchen" Rachel's voice was muffed but still audible, "Slaving for you people!"

Peyton giggled and got up, "I'm gonna help her."

"Make popcorn!" Haley shouted before Peyton disappeared to the kitchen. She slid to the side, smooching Nathan against the other arm of the couch, to let Brooke take a seat next to her. She noticed the girl's absent look for a moment and put one hand over her knee, rubbing it gently, "You OK? About Rachel."

"Yeah" she nodded to confirm it, "She'll be back in a few weeks and in the meantime I'll have daily slumber parties."

"Can I come?" Mouth whispered as he leaned over her.

Lucas leaned forward to their couch, "Me too?"

"Me three?"

"Skills!" Bevin slapped him on the arm.

They all started laughing and Haley eyed Nathan beside her, "Don't you even think about it."

He shrugged in defense, "I didn't say anything!"

They laughed again just when Rachel and Peyton walked in from the kitchen. Rachel had the jar of juice on her hands and Peyton had a couple more beers.

"I made a huge jar for the non-alcoholic ones" Rachel placed it next to the chips.

Peyton placed the bottles at the end table between two of the couches and took her seat again, "Haley, the popcorn's popping and should be ready in a minute."

"Thank you" she smiled almost childishly.

"OK" Nathan reached out for the DVD's again, "Seriously, what movie?"

"Uh!" Brooke clapped her hands together in excitement like she just had the best of the ideas, "Spice World!"

"No!" all the boys protested at the same time.

Brooke sunk on her seat, huffing, "Jeesh…"

"C'mon" Peyton grabbed the _Rush Hour 2_ DVD and held it up to show them, "Jackie Chan!"

Brooke rolled her eyes, annoyed, "Why don't you just marry him already?"

Taking a sip of her beer, Rachel got down to the floor and sat next to the coffee table, examining the movies carefully, "I think I should be the one choosing the movie since it's _my _goodbye party."

Haley nodded, agreeing, "That's fair."

"And since I choose by the hotness of the cast…" she reached out for a particular DVD and then held it high, smiling, "_Pirates of the Caribbean_."

"No!" Peyton quickly protested, shaking her head and waving her hands in the air.

Lucas sat up straight and started to weirdly move his hands around and spoke on an even weirder pirate accent, "Captain Jack Sparrow, matey."

Brooke rolled her eyes, "Oh my God…"

Skills leaned back on his seat holding his beer, "Now we'll never see the end of it."

Haley put her hands together to Rachel, "Please, pick something else before Lucas stands up and starts impersonating Johnny Depp."

"Yes, please!" Peyton begged along.

"What?" Lucas seemed somewhat insulted when the others started to laugh, "C'mon, it's fun!"

"_Pirates of the Caribbean_ is so four years ago" Bevin casually dished while crabbing a couple of chips and stuffing in her mouth.

Sitting next to her, Mouth raised one eyebrow, "It's the new one, from last year."

Bevin's eyes grew wide open, "Cool, that's a new one?" she reached out for the DVD on Rachel's hand and then turned back to the rest of the group, "Let's watch it!"

Seeing the negative response, Rachel shrugged and glanced over to Skills, "We could always watch _The Notebook_…"

The boy immediately raised his hand, "I vote for _The Notebook_!"

"No, please!" Brooke interfered shaking her head, "Nothing depressing. Let's just duck tape Lucas and watch hot Yummy Depp in a pirate costume" she smirked hopefully.

"I'll get the tape" Mouth got up and walked away.

Nathan reached out his hand and grabbed Lucas' arm, "I'll hold him down for you."

They all laughed and started to root when Lucas forced a fake laugh, "Ha-ha. You're all so funny."

---

The next day, first thing in the morning, Rachel left and Brooke was alone at the big house by herself. The two girls had an emotional goodbye that was wittily broken by Rachel's sarcastic comments in attempt to sooth the mood. It had been a few days and Brooke tried her best not to spend her nights alone, always inviting someone to sleep over. Mouth and Skills were the first ones to volunteer but only Mouth got to crash there since Bevin wasn't willing to let Skills do it. Although she spent the night by herself right after the other boy did.

---

It was the end of a rainy Sunday afternoon when Haley walked in Peyton's room. The girl was sitting by her desk located inside her walking closet. She was sketching some drawings and had her computer on, listening to her iTunes track list. Haley knocked on the open door and stepped in, taking a place by the head of the bed.

"You really should start locking your front door when you can't hear a hippo climbing up the stairs."

Peyton looked up from her sketch board and chuckled at Haley's commentary. The girl was starting her sixth month of pregnancy but one could easily mistake as her fourth. Even though she was a small girl and the baby's father was, on the other hand, very tall, she didn't seem to be gaining too much weight. The baby boy was for sure going to be petit as her, at least on his early years, considering the reduced size of her bump. But she still enjoyed complaining about how big she had gotten and Peyton was starting to wonder if she didn't do that just to hear people saying otherwise.

So she decided to humor her, "You're not that big."

"Stress the word 'that' more" Haley leaned back on the bed and placed both hands over her small bump.

"So" Peyton threw the board over her desk and got up to sit on the bed as well, "What brings you here, besides self love?"

"A favor" Haley started with a puppy face, the one she always had when she wanted something, "Nathan and I've been talking about moving out after the baby's born and starts to take up much space, but in the meantime we wanna make like a baby corner in our bedroom. We already have a little dresser and we're gonna buy the crib next month… but we'd really want to demark the baby's space with, like, a really cool wall painting" she grinned at the last part.

Peyton raised one eyebrow and tilted her head a little, narrowing her eyes at the girl, "I think I see where this is going."

"Please?" Haley asked again with the puppy face, "Nothing too hardcore or emo, though. Just… babyish stuff."

Peyton hesitated a little, enjoying the girl's expectation, and then finally nodded, "Absolutely. That way I can influence on the kid's good artistic sense since the beginning. Visually speaking, because musically he's got…" she pointed to Haley, waiting for her to figure the end of the sentence.

"Nathan's hip-hop" Haley concluded with a giggle.

"I'll work on some drafts and bring them over to you tomorrow."

"Great" Haley thanked and leaned back again, sighing loudly and rubbing her stomach a little, "Do you have anything to eat?"

The chuckle that came out of Peyton was enough to amuse Haley. She had been starving constantly for weeks now and people stopped finding that weird, just nodding along anytime she complained about being too hungry.

"I've got Chinese leftovers."

Haley hesitated tilting her head to see if the suggestion caused any kind of reaction from her stomach, but it didn't so she shrugged and got up, "That will do!"

Once in the kitchen, Peyton opened the fridge to grab the little Chinese boxes of food and placed them over the dinning table as Haley found the plates and chopsticks. They both took seats in front of each other and started to dig on the boxes. Peyton took the calm moment to speak.

"Have you talked to Brooke lately?"

"Yeah" Haley glanced over the boxes to her, "At school and she stops at the apartment sometimes. Why?"

Peyton shook her head, "Nothing, it's just… she seems a little distant. Almost indifferent."

"It's probably the Rachel moving out thing" Haley really hated to lie, but it wasn't her right to tell that kind of thing on Brooke's behalf. Besides, she owned the girl one for covering up for her at the beginning of her pregnancy when Brooke kept her secret safe and sound.

Not very convinced, Peyton hesitantly nodded, "Yeah, you're probably right."

"You know" Haley played with the food with her chopsticks, "She's alone on that big, huge house… just like you are here."

"I've thought about it" Peyton did the same with her food, "But I don't know, with Lucas around if that'd be such a good idea."

"Why not? I thought you were all friends. She told me Lucas took her out for ice cream the other day and you even joined them."

"Yes, that's when she left" Peyton sighed, tiredly, "I think she's fine with hanging out with me and hanging out with Lucas, but not with the two of us at the same time."

Haley scoffed, chewing, "If you two would stop being so couple-ly all the time it'd might do some help."

"We're not couple-ly" Peyton shot back with a hurt tone, "We hang out the same way we did before."

Haley rolled her eyes and laughed, "Oh, please! You two are always at each other's faces. It's really… I think it gave me a cavity" she put one finger on her open mouth, to check her tooth.

Peyton narrowed her eyes at her, pointing the chopsticks, "You're one to talk. You and Nathan with that always and forever cheesy crap."

"Those are completely different situations!" Haley's voice got squeaky.

"How so?"

"When Nathan and I started going out we couldn't do…" she waved her chopsticks in the air, "Stuff. So we made up by being over romantic with each other."

"You got married less than, like, four months after you started dating."

"Five!" Haley corrected her, "And stayed married for like three months before I ran out. When I came back I had to win him back we were back to the romantic thing, he was rude and then cheesy again to apologize, so if you see it's all…" she sighed and went back to digging her food, "It's circumstantial, really."

Peyton started to laugh at Haley's effort to justify herself, "That's a big word there, Tutor Mom."

Not really amused, Haley pouted, "Egg roll?" and threw one at Peyton's head.

* * *

_The title is a song by_ The Fray 


	8. Leap of Faith

_OK, so this time I can actually blame it on my stupid computer that got broken almost two months ago and only now came back from the shop. I was freaking out a little cause I thought I'd lose everything I had already written on this story but it turns out it's all in here safe and sound. Yay! Now just bear with me for some time more and I'll update again. This time I merged two chapters together as a 'I'm sorry' and 'please forgive me' bribe. I hope you enjoy and I hope I can update soon for real this time._

* * *

Monday came and with it, cheering practice. Brooke had scheduled the gym for the squad to practice after classes and before the team started their own. All the girls were already there, stretching and gossiping while Brooke glanced every two minutes to her watch, worried about Peyton's delay. Just when Bevin and Ashley started to argue about one of the moves, Peyton waltzed into the gym with her stereo on her hands and dropped her bag on the floor, next to the other ones.

"Music's here!"

"And it's right on time" Brooke walked next to her and pointed to one of the steps of the bleachers, "Put it here."

Peyton put the stereo down while Brooke snooped through her bag to find the CD with the choreography's song. She set it up and turned to the blonde girl next to her who was taking her sweater off to get ready for practice.

"So I have an invitation for you."

Brooke's eyebrow arched with curiosity, "Uh, party?"

Peyton's chuckled, "Not really. I was thinking of going to check out that new coffee music place down at the Riverwalk tonight."

"Sounds cool."

"It'd be me, you…" she held her breath for a second, "And Lucas."

Brooke's enthusiasm quickly faded as she slightly shook her head, unsure "Peyton, I don't…"

"C'mon!" she didn't let her friend finish, "We never hang out the three of us anymore."

"We _never_ hung out just the three of us" Brooke clarified, annoyed.

Peyton shrugged, "Can't we start? Give it a shot, if it doesn't work, I'll drop it."

Brooke pondered for a moment or two and then nodded, giving up, "OK. I'll give it a shot."

Smiling, Peyton gave her a side hug as a thank you and the two girls were walking back to rejoin the rest of the group when Haley showed up holding a wicked basket.

"Hey!" she sounded chipper, "I brought brownies" and lifted the basket in the air, proudly.

All the girls turned to face her and Peyton opened her eyes widely, "Whoa."

"Aren't you soccer mom already?" Brooke peeked inside the basket as Haley opened it, "What's this for?"

"Well, I can't practice anymore but I'm still part of the squad, right?"

"Yeah" Brooke confirmed, "I only wish you were still a practical part, though. With Rachel gone and you in maternity leave I'm gonna have to make huge adjustments on my routine and that can't be made over night, you know? I have to make some careful thinking" she started to daze off, "I might need Mouth for this…"

Haley and Peyton exchanged looks and chuckled as Bevin shouted from the middle of the court, "Captain, are we practicing or what?"

"Yeah!" Brooke shouted back and turned to Haley with a wink, "Stick around."

They group gathered again and finished their warm up. Brooke personally placed girl by girl on the exact spot she wanted them to be in and returned to her position in front of them, to take a better look at the group. She nodded, proud of herself and gave the sign for Haley to press play on the stereo. As the music's intro played along, Brooke bent over to tie her sneakers but when she came back up she felt the room around her spin and lost her balance, almost falling back.

"Are you OK?" Peyton came to wrap one arm around her waist, to support her up.

Haley was already behind Peyton and leaned over to Brooke's other side, "Brooke…" she whispered wanting to know what was going on, but Brooke brushed both of them off.

"I'm fine. It was just a head rush" she barely finished her sentence and then fell back again, with Peyton's hand on her back to stop her from hitting the floor.

"That it's still going" she walked Brooke with Haley's help, to the bleachers again and made her take a sit on one of the steps, "Maybe it's your blood pressure."

"I also brought chips!" Haley quickly went back to her basket.

"No!" Brooke protested, "No chips, I'm fine."

Peyton took a seat next to her and kept one of her hands on the girl's back, "If it's your blood pressure you gotta eat something salty."

"It's not!" she tried to raise her voice but it only came out on a whisper, "I don't wanna eat anything."

Haley came back with a bag of chips on her hands and handed it to her, but the girl only made a face and turned it down. Peyton grabbed the chips and opened the bag, decided to shove it down Brooke's throat if she had to, when they heard the stereo making a weird sound.

"Peyton?" Ashley called out to her, "Your stereo's going funky."

Rolling her eyes, Peyton dropped the chips and got up to go check what was wrong. Left alone with Brooke, Haley sat next to her and brushed some of her hair away from her face as the brunette glanced down at her own shoes.

"I'm gonna throw up" she mumbled.

"You had chemo today?" Haley whispered already knowing the answer, "You shouldn't make exercises."

"I couldn't cancel practice so close to game day" Brooke tried to explain, but at Haley's disapproving look, she waved her hand in the air, "Don't say anything, Haley. Just take me home, please."

Doing as told, Haley helped Brooke back on her feet and when Peyton approached them again, asking where they were going, Brooke said she wanted to go home and take some rest so she could feel better for practice the next day. Peyton agreed and Brooke left her in charge of the squad for the time being.

Once at Rachel's house, Haley took Brooke to her bedroom and helped her lay down on her bed, arranging the pillows around her. She was practically a mom already.

"Here you go" she sighed, throwing her long dark blond hair behind her shoulder, "Feeling better?"

Laid on the bed, Brooke closed her eyes and moaned, "Only when this is over."

Haley took a seat next to her on the bed and caressed her forehead, "Do you want me to spend the night here?"

"No, it's OK" she opened her eyes again and forced a smile, "I just need some rest and I'll be good as new."

"You sure? Cause I can stay."

"No, you can go."

Haley stuck around for a while before she finally left. She wanted to make sure Brooke was really well enough to be left alone, but when the girl threatened to kick her out by herself, Haley figured she was pretty good already. The cell phone rang twice before Brooke could reach it and flip it open, without looking at the screen to see who it was first.

"Hello?"

"Hey, it's me" Peyton's familiar voice was on the other side of the line, "Are you better?"

"Yeah" she lied… again. "It was just blood pressure after all."

"Good! I mean, that it's nothing serious."

Brooke sighed loudly, "Yeah."

"So we're still up for tonight?" she asked hopefully.

"Sure, I'll see you there" Brooke was going to say no, but the excitement on Peyton's voice made her change her mind.

"Cool. Bye!"

---

After fifteen minutes of turning around and stirring on her bed, Brooke decided to get up, get changed and go talk to Peyton. She knew she wouldn't be able to handle hanging out with both the girl and Lucas. She didn't even want to. The constant lies she had to tell them every time they were around were just too much for her to take and it was something that consumed her daily. It hurt her more than she could express in words when her best friend and her boyfriend sneaked around behind her back and she didn't wish that to anyone. To be lied to, like she was. And now she was doing the same thing to them. She wasn't cheating but she was hiding something huge, something she knew she should've told them a long time before. But she didn't and now she couldn't even face them anymore.

Not knowing exactly what she was going to say, Brooke drove to Peyton's house anyway. She didn't knock – she never really did – and climbed the stairs, breathing slowly to try and calm down. Without knocking on the open door, Brooke walked in the bedroom with a weak smile on her face.

"Hey, P. Sawyer!"

Sitting on her bed, Peyton had a laptop on her legs and turned her head around to see the girl by the door and smiled back, "Hi" and frowned a little, "Aren't you early?"

"Yeah… no" she stuffed both hands on her jeans' back pockets, uncomfortably; "I can't go out with you and Lucas tonight."

"Why not?" Peyton shut the laptop and put it aside on the bed.

Brooke opened her mouth twice but hesitated too much to form any sentence. She bit her lower lip and glanced down at the rug next to Peyton's bed and slowly lifted her eyes, "Something came up and…"

Peyton knew Brooke all too well to know when she was lying or trying to hide something from her and she knew she was. Not only right now, but for the last few weeks. She thought it had something to do with her dating Lucas; it had to be, because that was the only thing that changed between them since she started acting weird.

"You can't see us together" she concluded, "I get it."

Brooke's shoulders contracted closer and she shrugged confused, "What?"

The locks on Peyton's hair shook as she sat differently on the bed; sticking her legs out, "The other day when you were having ice cream and I showed up and you left…" she shrugged sympathetically, "I got it."

Not quite believing the irony of it all, Brooke shook her head, "That's not it."

"Do you still have feelings for him?" Peyton's question hammered Brooke on the head as she got up from the bed, facing the girl who was still standing close to the door, "Cause you can tell me, I wanna know."

"What?" Brooke scoffed, bringing both hands to cover her face as she threw her head back and mumbled to herself, "God, that's so screwed up…" she put her hands down, "No, that's not it. Listen… you wanna sit down again?"

Peyton shook her head and crossed her arms, "I'm fine."

"Alright" Brooke courageously took a deep breath; straitening herself up, "I don't know how to do this with you" she started to lose her courage and held her hands together, staring at Peyton who anxiously waited for an explanation.

Brooke closed her eyes for a moment and wished, with all her strengths that she could open her eyes and realize it was all a bad dream. It was bad enough that she had to deal with this, but to tell the ones she loved and get them sucked in, too? It just wasn't fair and she hated that. But she also knew the longer she postponed it, the more she'd hurt and get hurt in the process.

"I've been sick for a while and doing a treatment to get better" she spilled at once and then slowed down a little, "But it's gonna take a really, really, really long time 'til I'm done."

Peyton didn't react. She kept standing still on the same spot she was before, with her arms crossed and staring at Brooke in front of her.

"I don't…" she blinked a couple of times, "How sick? What is it?"

Her voice was filled with fear of the answer to come, but she had to ask anyway. Brooke saw right through her and flashbacked to all the times in her life Peyton was the one with the problem and she was the one to help her out. She loved helping Peyton; it made her feel she mattered, but it also made her realize how fragile the girl was, far more than she appeared to be.

"God, Peyton" Brooke's voice cracked a little, "I don't wanna do this with you because I know what you went through with Ellie and…"

At the mention of Ellie's name, Peyton uncrossed her arms and immediately backed up, stumbling on her bed and getting away from Brooke as she shook her head, "No. No, that is not…"

"I have cancer."

The words echoed on the room for a moment. It was the first time Brooke ever pronounced that word and admitted to someone that's what she had. She kept on an internal denial so far, until the day Nathan said it. She managed to brush it off, but now, seeing Peyton like that in front of her, she knew she had to. If anything, her friends deserved the truth.

"No!" Peyton shouted and then shook her head furiously with her locks hitting her face, "That's not true, Brooke."

She kept on shaking her head as the tears flooded her eyes and started to roll down her cheeks. Brooke couldn't move, although she wanted to. Lunching on Brooke's direction, Peyton pulled her to a hug and held her tightly.

"I can't lose you, too" she cried on Brooke's hair, "Not _you_."

"You won't" Brooke rubbed Peyton's back up and down to try and sooth her, "I'm gonna get better."

"You can't be sick" Peyton ignored Brooke's words, "You're not sick!" she tightened the hug harder and Brooke felt her ribs crushing.

"Peyton, you're hurting me" she whined and slowly broke Peyton from her.

Sniffing, Peyton started to shake, "This can't be happening."

Brooke leaded her back to the bed and made her seat down next to her. She rubbed the girl's arms to make her stop shaking, "Look at me. Peyton? It's gonna be OK" she attempted a smile, "C'mon, where's the fearless P. Sawyer I know?"

Peyton continued to cry, "She's gonna be gone if you go."

Brooke brushed some tears from Peyton's face and struggled not to cry herself. She had to be strong all the way, "I'm not going anywhere. I'm not, I promise you."

She smiled weakly one more time and hugged Peyton again. The girl kept crying for a while and then started to calm down, after losing her strengths. Brooke made her lay down and laid down next to her and after a while Peyton fell asleep, holding Brooke's hand.

---

Physically and emotionally exhausted, Brooke barely managed to drive back home and drag herself out of the car and into the house. She walked into the living room and was about to drop her tired body on the couch when she heard a noise coming from the kitchen. Quickly up and alert to any other noise, Brooke tip toed back to the door and grabbed an umbrella from behind it. She held it up with both hands and slowly walked towards the kitchen where another noise could be heard. Closing her eyes shut for a second, she wished it was just the wind, but when she opened them again she saw a shadow coming on her direction. She made a face and lifted the umbrella higher, letting a very loud scream out when the person collided with her on the hall. The girl screamed back and put both hands on her pregnant belly, in defense.

"What the hell, Haley!" Brooke put the umbrella down and one hand over her heart, "You scared the crap out of me!"

"I'm sorry!" Haley caught her breath, still holding her belly, "I didn't mean to. Your door was unlocked; you know you should lock it."

"What are you doing here?" she walked back to the living room with Haley right behind her.

"Deb just got us a new answering machine and since I know you don't have one and now that you're living alone… you might need one."

They both took seats. Brooke spread herself around on the big couch as Haley sat on the edge of the armchair, looking at her.

"Thanks, but couldn't this wait 'til I was at the house?"

"I saw you weren't home and got worried" she bit her lips together, "You don't look so good."

Brooke sighed, heavily, "I told Peyton."

"Oh, honey" Haley got up and took a seat next to Brooke on the couch, taking her hand, "How bad was it?"

"Worse than I ever thought" she sighed again, closing her eyes to remember the scene, "She was so heartbroken; I mean… it broke my heart, too. She cried so hard that she lost it and then fell asleep. I sneaked out after a while."

Haley frowned, "You left her alone?"

"I wrote a note. I couldn't be there for when she wakes up, it's gonna be round two and I can't take it" she shook her head, tiredly, "I'm done, Haley. I'm done telling."

"But what about –"

"No, it's too hard. I don't wanna tell anybody else and I don't want anybody else to know either. Not the school, not the squad, not even my parents."

"You haven't told them yet?!"

"No and I'm not going to!" Brooke raised her voice for a second, "Haley, I can't. Not after Peyton. I really can't."

---

The week went by slowly and boringly. After sneaking out of Peyton's room and leaving her with nothing but a note, Brooke kept on avoiding the blond girl at every opportunity she got. Coming late for classes so they wouldn't have time to talk and leaving earlier, always with a note or something to excuse herself and spending lunch times at her car or with Mouth, somewhere away from Peyton's sight. She didn't mean any harm; she just couldn't deal with the emotional stress she knew she'd have to go through when she faced Peyton again after that day.

After quickly brushing her hair, Brooke put her brush back on her backpack and grabbed a neutral lip gloss and softly spread on her lips, looking at herself on the bathroom mirror. She shot one last look at her figure that was staring right back at her and sighed. She couldn't help but notice all those hair products she had been using her whole teenager life weren't being able to fight with the amount of medicine on her body and her hair was quickly losing its shine.

"Hi!"

Peyton's voice snapped Brooke from her thoughts. The girl stepped in the bathroom and closed the door behind her, locking it and then rushing through the stalls to check if there was anyone in there.

"Peyton? What are you doing?"

She finished checking the bathroom and turned to Brooke, "We need to talk."

By her tone of voice, Brooke knew it wasn't just chit chatting or any dark secret she wanted to share in the girls' bathroom. Which it was usually what they did there, "What here? Now?"

"Yeah" she placed both hands on her hips, "Why are you avoiding me? You can't just drop a bomb on me like that and then run away, Brooke."

"I'm not running" she crossed her arms against her chest, defensively; "I just can't deal with this stuff right now."

"Oh no?" Peyton faked surprised and then her tone got harsher, "Then when? When it's too late and since you're dying anyway, so you decide – why the hell not – and bond with me again?" her words echoed on the almost empty bathroom. Brooke stood on her spot, not able to move and scared of the girl's aggressive tone of voice. She knew Peyton was projecting some of her contained anger towards her birth mother, but she couldn't help but to feel bad and take it personally.

Peyton saw the hesitation on Brooke's eyes and sighed loudly, trying to regain her calm, "Look, I don't blame Ellie for what happened because she only did what she thought it was right. But it wasn't and you saw it! So, please, don't do it, too" she pleaded, "Just let me in. It's all I'm asking."

They fell into a silence that lingered for more than it should. Brooke saw the anxiousness on Peyton's face and how much she wanted to be part of that and help her anyway she could instead of being a bystander. She twitched her mouth to the side and a single dimple appeared on her right cheek as she slightly shrugged.

"OK. You're right" she softly agreed.

Peyton gave her a warm smile and reached for her hands, "I'm here for you. Like always."

Brooke nodded to let her know she understood, "I was scared to tell you and how you were gonna react."

Peyton couldn't help the chuckle she let out. For all her life, Brooke was the one helping her out and when it was time for her to do the same for her, Brooke was afraid she wouldn't, "I love you for worrying but you shouldn't. You don't have to worry or be scared anymore, OK? I'm not gonna leave you."

Struggling with the tears that surfaced but wouldn't roll free, Brooke leaning towards her, "Don't make me cry" and hugged Peyton tightly, "I love you, P. Sawyer."

"I love you too, B. Davis" Peyton smiled as they prolonged the hug 'til the two of them felt like they had finally made peace with each other.

---

They did made peace with each other and the days that came after that they went everywhere together as if attached by the hips. Brooke had made Peyton promise she wouldn't tell Lucas or anyone else about her and that she'd tell them in her own time. Even though she wasn't comfortable lying to Lucas, Peyton understood her reasons and promised her she wouldn't tell. But it was hard when he was around her to act like everything was cool so she spent most of her time with Brooke instead of with Lucas. Fortunately it was the same week that Lucas had to go to Charlotte for some heart exams almost everyday so he didn't even had the time to miss his girlfriend all that much.

It was the end of a Wednesday afternoon when Haley finished packing her hospital bag. She still had a few months ahead of her before the baby was born but she wanted to make sure she didn't have to worry about last minute details such as the bag she was supposed to take with her to the hospital when she got into labor. The bag was duly placed on the left side of her closet when the doorbell rang. She walked towards the living room, shouting.

"I'm coming!" she reached the door and opened widely to see her friend standing outside, "Hey, Peyton."

She squeezed between the door and Haley to step in, "Is Brooke here?"

"No, she's not" Haley closed the door and followed Peyton around to the kitchen area, "Why?"

"She missed her chemo session and I can't find her" she turned around with one hand over her forehead, making Haley get worried.

"What?" she shook her head, "She never missed a session before. Are you sure?"

"Yes, I was supposed to meet her at the hospital and give her a ride back home and she never showed up. And I waited for like, 40 minutes!"

Haley sunk on the kitchen stool, "Oh my God… well, she's not here, have you tried Mouth?"

"No, he was my next stop."

"OK" she quickly got up, "Calm down, I got it" reaching for the cordless phone, Haley dialed Mouth's home number and waited a few seconds, "Hello, Mrs. McFadden? Hi, it's Haley. How you doing? Me and the baby are fine, thanks for asking. Uh, Mrs. McFadden, is Marvin there? OK" she covered the speaker with one hand and whispered to Peyton, "She went checking."

Peyton made a face, "Marvin?"

"She doesn't like 'Mouth'" she shrugged off and then went back to the phone, "Yes? Oh, OK then. Thank you a lot. Bye!" she hung up and turned to her friend shaking her head, "He's not there and he doesn't have a cell phone."

"Then maybe he's with her, right?" she asked hopefully, "We just gotta find them."

"Just let me grab my jacket and leave Nathan a note" Haley hurried to do what she said.

A few minutes later and they were already in Peyton's car, driving around the streets and on the look for either Mouth or Brooke. They went over Mouth and Brooke's place, the Café, the school and were on their way back to Peyton's house when Haley grabbed Peyton's right arm.

"Wait! Turn around, I think I found them."

Doing as told, Peyton glanced ahead of them, "What are they doing at the Rivercourt?"

They parked right next to the court and popped out in a hurry as they walked over Brooke and Mouth who were in the middle of the court with a basketball with them.

"Brooke Penelope Davis, are you trying to give me a heart attack?" Peyton shot as they approached.

Brooke giggled, thinking she was joking and waved, "Hey, girlies! What's up?"

They stopped in front of the boy and the girl, "You left me waiting for you at the hospital for almost an hour."

"Crap!" Brooke covered her mouth with both hands, "I forgot my chemo session!"

"Brooke, you know you can't skip those" Haley tried to reason with her and the girl frowned.

"I didn't _skip_."

"It's my fault" Mouth stepped in, "I should've known she had a session today."

"No, you shouldn't!" Brooke glanced over from Mouth to Peyton and Haley, "Look, thank you all for caring but I don't need babysitting. OK? Besides, it's no big deal; I'll just call Dr. Brown and reschedule a session for tomorrow. Alright?"

They all nodded together and Peyton sighed, "So what are you doing here anyway?"

"Well" Brooke's voice softened a little, "I made a list of things I wanna do before I get too sick to do it."

"Brooke…" Haley shrugged at the sound of that. She tried her best not to think in the worst case scenario and she didn't want Brooke of all people to do it.

"I know we're all very positive" Brooke rolled her eyes, "But it could happen" she smiled a little to make sure Haley was OK and went on, "Anyway, the top of the list was…" she turned to Mouth who finished her sentence for her.

"Learn how to do a free throw."

Haley laughed, "And you asked Mouth to teach you?"

Offended by her tone and insinuation, Mouth stepped ahead, "Hey, I may have never played but I've spent years watching the guys play so I think I'm up for the task."

Amused, Haley took the ball from Mouth's hands, "Like watching makes you an expert."

"If that was the case then Tim would be a sex God" Brooke mumbled much to everyone's amuse.

"I'm married to the Captain of the team who has – in fact – taught me a few things" she cockily walked towards the hoop, "Observe."

She focused on the hoop for a moment, breathing in and then raised her arms with the ball on her hands, bent her knees a bit to take impulse and then threw the ball that went directly into it.

Peyton whistled high as Brooke clapped, excitedly, "Alright, Tutor Player! Come and teach me how to do that!"

Brooke walked towards Haley and listened carefully to what she had to say. Peyton and Mouth headed towards the small bleachers behind the court and took seats next to each other.

"So how's she doing today?"

"She's good" Mouth nodded and then tried to apologize, "If I knew she had chemo…"

"No, she's right" Peyton kept watching the two girls attempting to shoot hoops ahead of them, "She's responsible enough. I guess I just overreacted."

"You just care about her like we all do."

Peyton turned to Mouth and smiled, rubbing his arm. They kept watching Brooke and Haley for a moment when she took his arm and linked with hers.

"And how are things going on with you, Mouth? Any chicks I should be in the look out for being so close to your hotness?"

Mouth laughed, "Oh yeah. Plenty!"

He got quiet and looked down. Peyton bumped her shoulder with his, "You miss Rachel, don't you?"

"More than I thought I would."

"She's coming back" she reassured him, "It's just for a few weeks."

"I know, but she's not coming back to _me_" he admitted weakly.

Peyton felt sorry for him for had fallen for someone like Rachel. She never really understood how could a sweet and smart guy like Mouth like someone so… Rachel. Screaming with excitement for had managed to score her first throw, Brooke waved to them.

"Hey, Mouth! Come on! I think I can teach _you_ now!"

---

Lucas walked into the school gym and took a seat by the bleachers where he could watch the team practice. He was so used to be in those practices for the last two years that he only realized he was heading there when he saw the gym's double doors at the end of the hall. He had to constantly remind himself he was not part of that team anymore. His heart couldn't be in it anymore, literally.

From the opposite side of the gym, Coach Durham spotted Lucas sitting alone and raised his voice louder than the players' rushed steps across the court, "Lucas! Do you plan on practicing?"

"No, Coach" Lucas shouted back, "I'm just looking."

"Well, there are no bystanders on my practice, young man. You're either in or out."

Nathan jogged half way to the court, listening to the small talk and stopped to give his brother a nod as he waved his hand, "Come on, Lucas. Show the old man you still got it."

Whitey saw the boys laughing and deepened his frown and raised his voice higher, "Watch it, Nathan. I can still bench _your_ sorry ass."

Lucas lost his backpack on the bleacher, took off his jacket and got in the game. Nathan threw him the ball and they started playing, just like they always used to. After a 30 minutes practice, Whitey called it a break and the boys spread around the court to get some air and water.

Nathan threw a bottle of water to Lucas once they found seats and chuckled at Lucas' difficulty in breathing normally, "Careful not to collapse again, big brother."

"Thanks" he caught the bottle and took a huge loud gulp, "I missed this, you know?"

"What? Whitey constantly yelling how much we suck?"

They both laughed, "Even that. I missed this gym, fighting for the ball, team work… I missed this game" he explained, sadly.

"It's still here for you" Nathan shrugged, "You just gotta adjust."

"I can't play it half way" he shook his head, "It'd ruin some of the magic."

Nathan opened his mouth to add some words of comfort of some kind to his brother when he heard his cell phone ringing inside his backpack. He unzipped the bag and glanced over the screen once it was flipped open, "Hey, babe. What?" he frowned, "Whoa… slow down, Haley. OK, where are you guys now? OK, I'll be right there. Bye."

He hung up and met Lucas' anxious eyes, staring back at him, "What is it? Everything OK?"

"Haley's at the hospital with Peyton and Brooke."

"Is it the baby? She OK?" he asked already standing up.

Nathan grabbed his backpack and hung it over his shoulder, "No, she's fine. You might wanna come with me."

"Nathan" Lucas grabbed his brother's arm to make him stop, "What is it?"

Sighing heavily, Nathan let the words drop off his lips, "It's Brooke."

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_A bit of a cliffhanger to keep you guys hooked. Once again, I'll try to own up to my promise to update sooner than later. And now... review time!!_


	9. I Will Walk On Water

_I kept my promise! I'm updating soonish. Hee. There's a holiday here in Brazil starting tomorrow and I won't be able to get online 'til Sunday so I'm dropping this chapter for you guys now. Hope you like it, it's something you've been waiting for quite some time. Just don't be too disappointed if it's not exactly how you'd like it to be. Things will start changing a big after this chapter. Hold tight! Oh, and leave nice reviews._

* * *

_How long have I been in this storm?  
So overwhelmed by the ocean's shapeless form  
Water's getting harder to tread  
With these waves crashing over my head_

Holding one cup of tea on each hand, Haley turned her back to the door and gave it a push with her butt so she could walk inside. The hospital room was neatly organized with just a few pieces of furniture. The patient's bed, a small couch for two very skinny people, an armchair beside the bed and a TV hanging from the upper side of the wall across the room. On the other side of the bed there was a small bedside table with a vase of flowers, an empty jar of water and two remote controls: one for the TV and one for the bed. Sitting on the armchair, Peyton had her elbow leaning on the arm of the chair and her face on her hand. Haley came from behind her and stuck out the cup of tea in the air in front of her.

"Iced tea?"

It definitely wasn't a hot day, but Haley couldn't have caffeine due her pregnancy and it was driving her insane lately. With all that was going on, she could use the rush. But since she couldn't, neither could anyone around her, she kept offering people the same drink she was having whenever she was the one that had to pick the drinks up.

Knowing that, Peyton only glanced up with a polite smile, taking the cup, "Thanks."

Haley took a sip of her tea and found a seat on the small couch, a couple of feet away from the bed. Lying on it, Brooke seemed to be peacefully sleeping, but the girls knew it better. They got to the hospital with an unconscious Brooke that was quickly medicated and placed in that same bedroom. They had collected her blood sample and the doctor said it was nothing serious, so they shouldn't have to worry and that Brooke would soon be up. It had been ten minutes since the doctor left the room and they were starting to get worried.

"Damn it" Haley cursed on a whisper, "I forgot to call Mouth."

"You want me to go call him?" Peyton offered but hoping Haley would do it herself. She didn't want to leave Brooke.

Guessing her real intentions, Haley slowly got up – that bump was getting heavier by the minute, she thought – and raised one hand in the air to stop her, "No, it's OK. Stay with her, I'll be right back."

As Haley left, Peyton refocused her attention on Brooke, in front of her. She hadn't even moved on her spot, not once, since they put her there. Which was odd since Brooke was an avid kicker when sleeping. If it was a couple of months before, Peyton would still have the bruises on her legs to prove it. They grew closer to each other again once Lucas and Peyton started dating. For what Peyton could see, it was Brooke the one to encourage Lucas to go for her so after that they slowly started to be in each other's lives again. But it was never quite the same as it was before their fight. It felt sad for Peyton that it took something this dramatic to bring the two of them together again. She even wished, more than once, that she could open her eyes and find Brooke ignoring her or bitching at her in the middle of the school hall, if that meant that she wasn't sick anymore.

Reaching out for Brooke's hand on the bed, Peyton held it tight and suddenly felt the girl's fingers gently moving, tangled on hers. She sat up straight and leaned over a little in time to see Brooke opening her eyes and confusingly looking around.

"Hey, welcome back" she whispered, squeezing Brooke's hand to get her attention.

Brooke's eyes danced around the room and then stopped on Peyton, "Where am I?"

"At the hospital."

"What happened?" she frowned.

"You don't remember?"

She narrowed her eyes further down to try and remember the latest events, "I remember the Rivercourt."

"We went back to Haley's apartment and you got a little dizzy" Peyton's voice was soft as she gently kept rubbing Brooke's fingers with hers, "You passed out, so we brought you here."

Brooke lightly shook her head on the pillow and tried to sit up, "I don't remember that. Why did I pass out?"

Peyton got up and put one hand behind her back to support her as she sat up, "The doctor said the chemo sessions made your immunologic system weak and that the smallest flu can turn into something more serious."

"Flu?" Brooke half chuckled and rested her head back on the pillows Peyton rearranged behind her, "It feels like I've been ran over by a giant monster truck."

"She said you knew about the risks. Didn't you?"

"I guess" she gave a small shrug and started to cough, "I'm thirsty."

"I'll go get you something to drink" Peyton turned around to leave but felt Brooke's hand stopping her.

"No. Stay with me, I don't wanna be alone."

"OK" Peyton came back and took a seat back on the armchair, pulling it closer to the bed, "When Haley comes back I'll ask her."

After peeing for the eleventh time on that same day, Haley went around looking for a paid phone. Since she couldn't find one, she walked to the reception to ask the nurse. There was no one behind the counter, so she had to impatiently wait by it, tapping her fingers on the counter. The front door was slammed opened and she turned around to look when she saw Nathan and Lucas rushing in. They spotted her and went directly towards her.

"Haley" Nathan opened his arm as she went straight to him and buried her face on his chest, "What happened?" he asked tightening the hug.

"Where's Brooke?" Lucas asked from behind Nathan, "Is she OK?"

Haley lifted her head to see Lucas and gave her husband a confused and awkward look, "Lucas?"

"He was with me, I had to bring him along" he justified himself, ignoring Lucas' utterly confused expression.

"OK, can _someone_ tell me what's going on?"

Still on Nathan's arms, Haley tried to give an explanation that wouldn't give too much away, "We were at the apartment and she… fainted."

"Where is she now?"

"She's asleep in the room, Peyton's with her" she turned her attention back to Lucas, "Just let me go tell her you're here."

Without being able to protest, Lucas just watched Haley walk away from them. He glanced over his brother who didn't say anything to clear his obvious confusion and then followed him down the hall.

---

Haley softly knocked on the room's door before opening it, "Peyton?" she called out but then saw Brooke sitting on the bed and talking to Peyton. She opened a content smile, "Hey, you're awake!"

"Hey, Tutor Mom" Brooke weakly smiled back, "I hope I didn't scare you and the bean too much."

"Just a little" Haley chuckled but then got serious again, "Uh… I called Nathan when we got here and he was with Lucas, so…"

"What?" Brooke let the small panic she was feeling out on that single word.

"He's outside wondering what's going on."

"Talk to him" Peyton got up and rubbed Brooke's arm, "There's no way around it anymore."

She reluctantly nodded, "Fine."

"We'll be outside" Peyton winked and left the room with Haley.

Brooke kept trying to control her breathing as she glanced to the closed door, waiting for it to be opened again. She suddenly wished she could escape through the window. She glanced over it for a moment but it was too small. Lucas walked in the room and Brooke held her breath for a second.

"Hey."

"Hi" she awkwardly moved on the bed.

He stepped closer to where she was, "Are you OK?"

"Not really" she attempted a yellow smile, "I'm thirsty and Peyton hasn't brought my water yet."

"I can get it for you."

As she saw Lucas turning around to leave, although she felt relief, she knew she couldn't postpone that any longer, "No" that made him stop midway and turn around, "Maybe later. I have to tell you something."

He nodded and she patted on the empty space on her bed. He took the seat on it, next to her legs and waited for her to speak. They must've stayed in silence for over a minute when Brooke opened her mouth a couple of times, but couldn't say anything.

"Are you sick?" he decided to start himself otherwise they'd have to stay there the whole day. He watched her nod quietly. He sighed, catching his breath, "Is it serious?" she nodded again. Frustrated by her silence, he tried again, "Can you give me a little more than that?"

Her eyes slowly started to flood with tears and something inside her was saying this time she wouldn't be able to hold them back, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. It's just too hard to tell."

"It's OK" he gently rubbed her left knee to sooth her, "You can tell me anything."

She felt his hand on her knee and her heart sunk a little. She didn't know if she could tell him, "I've got the flu."

"The flu doesn't exactly send people to the hospital, Brooke" he tried to chuckle, but was still serious.

"It sends me… my immunologic system has been weakened" she tried to repeat the words Peyton had told her a few minutes before.

"By what?" he asked already afraid of the answer.

Seeing how he was trying to remain calm, she froze for a second. He had one hand over her knee and the other one was closed on a fist on his leg. She saw how he kept squeezing his fingers together. He always did that when he was nervous and she knew that. She didn't want to say the words out loud; she didn't want to be the one to make him sad. At least not the way she knew he was going to be once he found out the truth. But he was there, in front of her and waiting for an answer so she at least owned him that. He was trying to be her friend, she had to admit. He was reaching out to keep her in his life and she didn't want to be left out anyway, so she had to try it too.

"Chemo sessions" she whispered so low she thought he wouldn't hear her. But he did.

"What?" the way his whole face turned from anxious to someone who had just been sucker punched on the stomach, made the flooding tears on Brooke's eyes to run freely down her cheek.

She had been holding them back for as long as she could remember. In fact, she hadn't really cried ever since she found out about her situation and it was that was just adding more pain to her.

"I have a tumor on my uterus" she started to cry and shake her head, "I've known for three months but I didn't do anything about it cause I was so scared but then I did and I started to tell people and it got real and I couldn't escape anymore" she blurted it out all at once, stopping when she chocked on her tears, "And I'm scared, Lucas. I'm so scared. I'm scared of this disease, of the treatment, of the side effects, of the consequences… everything" she was sobbing, "And I feel so alone even though everybody around me is trying to help. I don't wanna let them down and I try to be strong but it's _too_ hard."

She could barely mumble the last words and Lucas found himself silently crying when he moved on the bed, closer to her and pulled her in his arms for a hug. She held tight on him, her face buried on the crock of his neck as he rubbed her back for comfort.

"Sometimes is hard to breathe" her muffed voice came out on a whimper.

"I know" he tightened the hug as if by doing that he could make all her pain go away, "It's OK now."

"I told Peyton and it was horrible" she kept justifying herself, "I didn't know how to tell you."

He took one hand to her head, stroking her hair, "Don't worry about that. You're gonna get better" he tried to convince her as much as he tried to convince himself, "You're gonna get better."

---

Sitting alone on a chair on the empty hall, Peyton had a bunch of magazines on her lap. While Lucas was with Brooke she went down the newsstand across the street from the hospital and got every fashion and gossip magazine she could buy. The doctor said they'd have to keep Brooke over night and the magazines were going to be used as a distraction through that.

The door next to her was opened and Lucas came out with a tired look. He took a seat next to her and leaned back, closing his eyes.

"How is she?"

"Sleeping" he opened his eyes and glanced around, "Where's Haley?"

"Nathan convinced her to go home but they'll swing by later again" she got quiet for a minute and sighed staring at the boy, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. She asked me not to."

"Yeah, I get it" he gave her a half smile and then wrapped one arm around her shoulder, bring her closer to him and placing a kiss on the side of her head, "How are you holding up?"

She shrugged, nesting on his chest, "It's hard, but you know… it's Brooke. When we were on seventh grade she kicked the high school basketball captain on the shin because he made a pass on Bevin and made her cry" she chuckled, "She's tough."

Lucas sighed, shaking his head, "I don't know... this is pretty serious, Peyton. She puts on a tough act but she's really shaken up. She just cried herself to sleep."

Jerking away from Lucas' arm, Peyton raised her head, "She did?" she frowned a little, "I think that's the first time she cried since I found out."

"Then it's a good thing she did it now. It can't do her any good to keep holding those things in."

"Yeah" she agreed, collecting the magazines on her hands, "I'm gonna check on her. I don't want her to wake up alone."

"OK" he watched her get up and then got up; too, "I'll go grab a coffee. You want some?"

"No, I'm OK" she pecked his lips, "Thanks."

---

Entering the room with light steps not to wake Brooke up, Peyton placed the magazines on the bedside table, next to the vase of fake daisies. Reaching for the remote control, Peyton took a seat by the couch and turned on the TV on mute just to channel surf and keep herself entertained. Brooke woke up a few minutes later and scanned the room around her to find her best friend spread on the couch in front of the bed.

"Hey, blondie" she called out for her with a smirk and a husky voice, "Where's my water?"

Peyton promptly got up and took the ice bucket from next to the bed, "Here" she handed it to Brooke, "The nurse said it's better if you suck on ice cubs instead of drinking water."

Taking an ice cub on her fingers, Brooke shoved it on her mouth, feeling the tip of her fingers getting a little numb from the cold, "The only thing I'll be sucking for a long time."

"That's real classy" Peyton observed with sarcasm.

Brooke squinted, "You say that because you can suck on something other than ice cubs."

"Oh, hey, look!" she quickly grabbed the magazines from the table in order to distract Brooke and change the uncomfortable subject, "Pretty shiny gossip magazines."

"Gimme!" Brooke stretched out her arms in the air to take them and after a quick scan through the several covers, she pouted, "No porn?"

"Brooke!" Peyton shot her a look that made the girl shrug.

"What? I'm in a hospital, I can joke about whatever I want" she ended her rant and started to browse through the pages while carelessly flipping them. She stopped at the sight of a particular picture and twisted her nose in disgust, "My God. Britney has completely lost her mind. She can't get lower than this" she said pointing to the picture to Peyton who was now sitting on the bed next to her, "Look at this wig! She looks like a travesty, it's awful."

Leaning down closer to the magazine, Peyton imitated Brooke's disgust look, "Her wig's what you're worried about? Look at her outfit. She should not be wearing those pants."

Without being able to move or even breathe right, Brooke hesitated not knowing exactly how to say the words about to slip her lips, "I'll look better than her on a wig, right?" she asked on a whisper while Peyton moved on the bed to look at her. She gave a small shrug, "It already started" she chocked on the words for a moment, "I tried every hair product possible but it keeps falling and it even lost its shiny Wellaton glow" she attempted to joke with the last words.

Getting teary, Peyton wrapped one arm around Brooke's shoulder and gave her a tight side hug while brushing some tears from the girl's face, "You know you can rock anything, don't you?" she smiled encouragingly, "Wigs, hats…" she tapped the magazine, "Just never try those pants."

Brooke lightly giggled and Peyton pulled her closer to kiss the top of her head while rubbing her arm. Relaxing on her friend's arms, Brooke allowed herself to breathe in deeply before closing her eyes. She had yet to sink in the current situation around her. Things were starting to get out of hand, she was starting to wish for something else.

_If I could just see you  
Everything would be all right  
If I happen to see you  
This darkness would turn to light_

* * *

**Title and lyrics: **_Storm_, by Lifehouse. 


	10. Rewind

**A/N.: **_I was so happy with everyone's review! I'm really glad you're enjoying this story and I just wanna say 'sorry' in advance for leaving you with yet another cliffhanger. It's just that they're so efficient I just had to use it again. Kidding! But leave pretty reviews and I might updated sooner than I planned! Thanks again!!_

* * *

The next morning started with the sun shining really bright. Once again, Brooke though the weather was mirroring her feelings. She was certainly thrilled to be able to go home after the longest night of her life on that hospital. Running around the room, Haley was picking up everything she found out of place and shoving back on Brooke's bag. Plopped on the bed in front of the patient, Mouth was holding a few cards on his hands and was staring at them while Brooke fussed on her spot, holding her own cards, and waiting for him to show his.

After two minutes, just the right amount to annoy the hell out of Brooke, Mouth finally showed his cards by carefully placing them down between him and the girl with a big smirk on his face, "Full House!"

She opened her mouth in shock and then threw her cards on top of his, pouting, "You know you should be ashamed for taking advantage of a sick girl."

"Nice try" he laughed showing his hand, "Hand it over."

Reluctantly, Brooke leaned over her bedside and grabbed the cup of purple jell-o she was saving for later and handed it to Mouth. He grabbed the spoon and took the first taste of it while Brooke shook her head in disapproval.

"Are those yours?" Haley had a pair of gloves on her hands and shaking them in the air.

Brooke examined them from afar, "No, they're Peyton's" she took a second look, "Uh, but it's pretty! Put them on my bag."

"Where is she, by the way?" Mouth finished his jell-o and put the empty cup where it was before.

"She went home to take a shower but she'll be back to drive me home. Haley, what are you doing?" she asked annoyed when the girl wouldn't stop still.

Mouth glanced over the pregnant girl and then back to the one in front of him, "She tides up when she's nervous."

She nodded understandly, "What happened?"

"Nothing" Haley tried to brush if off but then sighed and started to explain, "It's nothing to worry about… it's Deb. She checked into a rehab clinic three days ago and last night she escaped."

"If she checked in, couldn't she have just checked out?" Mouth frowned a little confused.

Haley shook her head, "You'd think! Nathan's trying to find her. She is such a mess, I don't even know how she still keeps functioning" adding a dramatic sigh, "Forget my rant."

"Come on, Tutor Mom" Brooke slid to the side of the bed, "Take a sit and watch me beat Mouth next round."

She did as told while Mouth laughed, "Like that could happen."

When the doctor entered the room she found Mouth and Haley smooched with Brooke on the small hospital bed. Smiling very politely, the woman knocked on the open door before stepping in with some exam papers on her hands.

"Good morning."

"Morning, Dr. Brown" Brooke smiled back and the other two waved.

"What a crowded room so early in the morning."

Brooke shrugged looking up with a perky smile, "I'm very popular."

"Hey" Peyton greeted while walking in followed by Lucas. They both stopped next to the doctor.

"And it just got even more crowded."

"See?" Brooke pointed out.

Lucas smiled to greet the doctor and then turned back to the room, "Guess we're right on time."

"Ready to go home?" Peyton asked while stopping next to the bed and smiling to Brooke who smiled back in an affirmative response.

"Actually, that's why I'm here" Dr. Brown's word made the mood in the room instantly tense up, "I checked your tests and that flu bug isn't totally gone" she addressed directly to Brooke, "You still had a fever over night so we'd like to keep you in for a couple more days."

Twitching her eyebrows like if by asking nicely she'd change the doctor's mind, Brooke almost whined, "Really?"

Haley took her hand on hers, "But it's still just the flu, right?"

"Yes" the doctor nodded, "It's just that since her system's a little debilitated she'll take longer to heal. But you have nothing to worry about, we're just being cautioned" she smiled again, reassuringly, "I'll swing by again after lunch to check on you. And as for the rest of you guys" she glanced around, "Don't take too long. She needs rest."

They all mumbled a thank you to the doctor and then she left. They turned their attention to Brooke who was still holding Haley's hand and had Peyton's hand on her shoulder with a disappointed look.

"I really wanted to go home."

"I wish I could stay" Mouth started softly, "But I'm kinda late for class."

"You all have classes" Brooke stated the obvious like she had just realized that.

"No, that's OK" Peyton turned to her, "I can stay."

"Actually, we have Lit test" Haley got up to take her purse.

But Peyton took a seat next to Brooke, shaking her head, "I can blow it off."

"No, you can't" Brooke shook her own head, "Go to class and talk to Principal Turner about my… special situation. I think the nurse can give you a doctor's note or something."

Hesitantly, Peyton agreed with a head nod, "Alright, I'll see that."

Hanging her purse from her left shoulder, Haley came back to stroke Brooke's hair, "But you still can't be alone."

Brooke looked up to her and was about to say it was okay when Lucas stepped in, "I can stay with her. I already took the Lit test before going to Charlotte because I thought I wouldn't be back in time."

She shyly smiled and mouthed a "Thank you".

"OK" Mouth got up from the bed to take his own bag, "It's settled then. I'll come back later to kick your ass some more."

"You wish! I'm gonna keep practicing 'til you're back."

Chuckling, Haley leaned over Brooke and placed a kiss on her head, "Bye, sweetie. Take care."

Peyton did the same, "Get some rest. We'll be back by end of classes."

"OK" she sadly waved at them when they were by the door and then shouted, "Rush back!"

Tugging into the sheets spread over her, Brooke glanced at Lucas and sighed. He gave a side smile and went to sit by the edge of the bed, collecting the cards on his hands.

"So what is it that you're losing to Mouth?"

"Poker."

"To Mouth?" he repeated not believing it, "He's got the worst poker face ever. And I've played with my mom before."

Brooke giggled for a moment, "How is she by the way?"

"She's doing good. She was gonna come to see you last night but the Café was too busy. But she did bake you a cake though. I'll make sure she brings you later today."

"She baked me a cake? That's so… mom."

"That's my mom alright" he smiled and then got serious for a second, "Speaking of… what about your mom?"

Embarrassed, Brooke fiddled with her fingers on the sheet, "I didn't tell my parents yet."

Lucas frowned, "You didn't? Don't you think you should?"

"I know. I'll do it when I leave here" she promised, "I don't wanna freak them out in a hospital" clearing her throat, they fell into an awkward silence. She hated those. And she definitely missed when they weren't an issue, when they would just fill in those weird silences with make out sessions, "How are you and Peyton?"

"We're good" he moved on his spot to cross his legs on the bed a little more uncomfortable, "But you don't have to keep asking me how people are doing. You can just lose to me at Gin."

He started to deal the cards and she raised her eyebrows, "Oh big talk, don't you think?"

"Yeah, baby" he laughed making her laugh, too.

---

Later that same night, it was changing shifts time. When classes were over, they all went to spend the afternoon with Brooke. By four o'clock, the nurse kicked them out for being too loud and they took the opportunity to go home for a change. They all went; except for Haley who stuck around a little more to give Peyton some time to go home and come back later at night. She had just left and Peyton was on her way from the coffee machine to Brooke's room. When she walked in, she saw Brooke all content on the bed, eyeing the tall, strong, handsome young man who was arranging her pillows. He was leaning over her and she wasn't even hiding how much she was gawking at him.

"Thank you so much" she whispered once he finished.

"You comfortable now?" he asked patting the pillow one last time with a smile on his face.

She nodded still staring at him and not even noticing Peyton's presence in the room, "Very."

"Alright" he chuckled when realized she was really staring, "If you need anything else, just bip me" he referred to the control board next to the bed that had a button to call for nurse help.

"Oh, I will" she flirty assured him.

He nodded and turned around to leave, "OK. Bye."

"Bye…" she followed him with her eyes, checking his butt and almost falling off the bed.

He passed by Peyton and she stepped aside to let him go through. Holding the door open, she followed him down the hall with her eyes, 'til he was out of sight, then she turned back to smiling Brooke on the bed.

"Was that a nurse?"

"I love this hospital!" she squealed.

Peyton placed the plastic bag she had on her hands, on the couch, "And he was rearranging your pillows?"

"I asked for extra ones."

"Brooke, you can walk to the closet."

"And miss Sweet Cheeks?" she asked referring to the nurse's butt, "I don't think so!"

Amused with Brooke's good mood, Peyton pulled the armchair closer to the bed and took a sit, "So I have news for you!" she announced happy, "I called my dad when I went home and he's coming home in two days."

"What? Peyton's, that's so…" she started enthusiastically but then stopped, "You didn't tell him about me, did you?"

"Of course I did. Brooke, you might not wanna tell yours but you need a parent right now other than Karen to look after you."

Not able to hold in any longer, Brooke blurted out, "I told them. Last week, I called and told them."

Taken off guard, Peyton blinked a couple of times before speaking, "Where are they? Why aren't they here?"

"They were in Italy. My dad's dealing with some big shot company and my mom's with him" she shrugged trying to hold back the tears she refused to let out, "They said they're sorry and they worry but they can't come back right now. So they sent some money for the treatment."

"That's awful, Brooke" Peyton said more out of shock then anything else. Noticing how Brooke's chin started to quiver, she got up from the armchair and held Brooke close, "But that's OK, cause you know what? You have me, my dad, Lucas, Haley, Nathan, Karen, Mouth… and should I go on? You have tons of people who care and are here to help you no matter what."

Resting her head on Peyton's chest, Brooke sighed, "You're right. I'm so thankful for you guys."

"And when you leave here, we're moving you back to my house so my dad and I can spoil you properly."

Brooke lifted her head to look up to her, "Are you serious?"

Peyton nodded and then chuckled when Brooke started to cry, "We gotta get you out of here. This hospital is turning you into a softy."

Brushing off her tears, Brooke slapped Peyton on the arm, "Shut up!"

---

Knocking on the door as she swung it open, Haley's head popped inside Lucas' room as she glanced around looking for him. He was standing in front of his opened closet, trying to find a shirt to put over the t-shirt he was already wearing.

"Lucas Scott?" she walked in, towards him.

"Haley Scott?" he asked in response without having to turn around and see who it was.

She made a face with one hand over her bump while slowly dropping herself on his bed, "Why does it always sound I'm married to you when you say it?"

He picked out a random shirt and turned to her, "Can't we pretend it sounds like we're brother and sister?"

She pondered for a moment, "Yeah, that's less disgusting."

"Why is the idea of marrying me so disgusting?" he asked a little offended.

"Because…" she shrugged, "It's you."

He finished buttoning his shirt and fixed his sleeves, "Well… that explains much of nothing."

"So…" she scratched the back of her head while watched him fix his hair in front of a small mirror inside his closet. She wasn't sure he even brushed it at all anymore because it always looked like he had just rolled out of bed. But apparently, the casual look took as much time as the brushed one, "Did you know that from the three nights Brooke spent at the hospital, Peyton spent two with her and Mouth spent the last one?"

Not understanding where she was going with that, Lucas finished with his hair and went back to his nightstand and grabbed a bottle of cologne to spread on himself, "Yeah."

"And that you spent all three crashing in the waiting room?"

He shrugged, "I didn't want to leave Peyton."

"And the third night?" she insisted.

"Haley…" he sighed putting the bottle of cologne back where it was, "Do you have a point?"

She bit her bottom lip while unconsciously rubbing her belly, hesitating for a moment, "I may be shooting in the dark here, but… I think Brooke might still have feelings for you."

"What?" he almost chuckled, "Where did you get that from?"

"The way you two broke up, the way she acts around you and Peyton… the fact that she didn't tell you about her condition before" she listed the reasons as she counted on her fingers for him to see.

He shook his head and took a seat on the chair next to the study table, "She was just scared. It's not easy to tell people something like that, I should know it."

"Right" she nodded going to stand closer to him, "So who was the last person you told about your heart condition?"

"Brooke" he hesitantly admitted.

"And why is that?"

He shrugged but then got serious as he answered, "I was too in love with her. I didn't want to hurt her like that."

"Exactly" Haley shot him a look.

Getting up, he shook his head, "No, this is different. We're not together anymore. _She_ was the one who broke up with me and encouraged _me_ to go after Peyton who, by the way, is now my girlfriend."

"I'm sorry, but I don't think so" she watched him walk around the bedroom, "I know you're with Peyton and you love her… I love her too, OK?" she sighed pondering if she should go on, but since she had gone that far, she added, "But… Brooke's still _in_ love with you."

Refusing to believe her, Lucas shook his head again and turned around to leave to the living room. She followed him with her eyes again and that's when they both saw the blond girl standing by the bedroom door, listening to their conversation.

Peyton switched her glance from Haley to Lucas a couple of times, "What?"

* * *


	11. Can You Read My Mind?

_I came with a weekend treat! Sorry for the late update. Here you go and I hope you guys enjoy it. Thanks so much for all your reviews, I tried to reply to each of them and I think I didn't forget anyone. So I hope! _

_Oh, this chapter's title is a song by _**The Killers**.

* * *

Dragging a huge suitcase and a bag hanging from across his chest, Larry walked towards the front door of his house, observing the lights on in the living room. He tried the doorknob and, like always, the door was unlocked so he was able to walk in unannounced. Once inside, he dropped the bigger suitcase on the floor and stepped in the living room, watching the blonde and brunette girls plopped on the couch next to each other, enjoying a slice of pizza, each.

"No one to greet me hello at the door?" he asked shaking his head in disapproval.

Seeing her father by the door, Peyton jumped off the couch and launched to give him a hug, "Dad! You're early" she added after breaking the hug.

"Hey, kiddo" he hugged her back, "I wanted to make a surprise."

Getting up, too, Brooke walked to him, "Hi, Mr. Sawyer."

"How you doing, Brookie?" he asked pulling her to a tight hug, "You feeling OK?" he asked concerned while taking one hand to her forehead.

Seeing Brooke's lack of action, Peyton rolled her eyes, "Dad…"

"Oh, sorry" he retracted the hand.

"No, it's OK" Brooke smiled, "Feels good to be overprotected sometimes."

He smiled back at her and then glanced around, clapping his hands, "So what are you having? Pizza? Now, that's hardly healthy."

Even though he was putting up a straight face, Peyton knew he was mocking and went on, "It's healthier than if you'd cook something for us."

Pointing one finger at her, he narrowed his eyes, "I think you've been without parent supervision for too long, young lady."

"Young lady?" she repeated holding a chuckle.

Brooke made a face, "Ouch."

The doorbell rang and Larry nodded upstairs, "I'm gonna unload" and grabbed his suitcase before heading up.

Brooke raised one hand already rushing towards the door, "I'll get it!"

As he climbed the stairs, Larry shouted, "Save me a slice of that!" Peyton nodded and gave him a wave as he disappeared from her sight.

"Hey" Brooke greeted Lucas once she opened the door and found him standing outside.

He looked back at her and quickly glanced in, "Hi. Is Peyton there?"

"It is her house" she stated with a chuckle, not knowing why he was being so formal. She stepped aside for him to pass, "Come in" as he did it; she closed the door behind them, "What are you two doing tonight?"

Shoving both hands on his pockets, he shrugged, "I'm not sure."

"Does that mean sex?" she gave him an annoyed look, "Cause if it is then I really don't wanna know."

"No" he shook his head a little awkward, "It's…"

"Hey" Peyton interrupted him by stepping in the hall.

"Hi."

Glancing from Lucas to Peyton, Brooke sensed the weird vibe and got the hint, "Okay. Hate to break the tension in the air but I gotta go meet Mouth. See you later" she flashed them a dimpled smile and got out the door.

Left alone, they both exchanged looks before Lucas spoke, "Can we talk?"

"Yeah" she signalized the living room with her head, "Come on."

Taking seats on the same couch, Lucas watched Peyton fuss with her own fingers on her lap. He glanced around, buying some time and noticed the lights up on the upper floor.

"You OK?"

She nodded and looked up, too, "My dad just got here. He's upstairs unpacking."

"About yesterday…" he started knowing there was no use in continue to avoid the subject.

"I don't wanna talk about that" she stopped him, suddenly; "It took a lot of me to be OK with our situation… me, you and Brooke, so I could be with you. So I can't go back there" she shook her head, "I don't even know why Haley would bring that up."

"She was just…" he sighed and gave her a crooked smile, "Meddling."

She tried not to smile back, "Well, she shouldn't."

"She didn't mean harm" he slid on the couch to be closer to her, "Look, I'm with you because I want to, OK? No one forced me. If I didn't love you I wouldn't be with you."

Anxiously waiting for her response, he reached out for her hand and pressed it against both of his. She looked down at their hands together and numbly shook her head.

"I know no one forced you. But you were with Brooke because you loved her too and look what happened."

With a really bad choice of words, Lucas tried to explain himself, "We didn't broke up because I didn't love her anymore."

Almost retracting her hand back but willing to let him explain, Peyton frowned, "You still do?"

"No" he shook his head trying to explain again, "I did at the time. That won't happen to us."

Tucking some of her hair behind her ear, she looked down for a moment before looking up to him again, "Can you promise?"

He softly smiled, "I promise."

"How can you be sure?"

He leaned towards her, "Aren't you sure of us?"

Watching him smile made her smile too. She leaned over him and they hugged each other for a moment before she sighed and closed her eyes, wishing she could be as sure.

---

"Knock-knock!" Brooke announced her presence as she walked in the Tutor Center.

Classes hadn't started yet and a couple of minutes before she and Peyton arrived at school, she said she'd look for Haley and Peyton said she had to go meet Lucas. They separated from each other and in no time the brunette found her friend going through some students' files in the common room of the Center.

Turning around to see the girl by the door, Haley smiled, "Welcome back, Brooke!"

"Thank you" she smiled back, leaning over one of the walls.

Haley put the files back on the cabinet's drawers and reached for her backpack on one of the bigger tables to get ready to leave. She noticed Brooke was alone – something rare for the last few weeks – and frowned curiously.

"Where's your new roommate?"

"Dodging you" Brooke raised one of her eyebrows, "You two are acting weird around each other since the last day at the hospital. I'd ask Peyton if she wasn't being so damn defensive about it. Will you tell me what happened?"

Shrugging off, Haley shook her head, "Nothing happened."

The girl shot her a look like she knew there was something more, "Last time you two were like this was when you came back from the tour and even then I sided with you. Don't I get a little credit?"

"Tons of it. But really, nothing happened. If it did I'd tell you" she lifted her right hand in the air, "Promise."

Still not totally convinced, Brooke nodded agreeing, "Alright. You convinced me for the time being" she took Haley's arm to link with hers, "Walk me to class?"

"Sure" they started to walk around the door, "Let's go."

Half way to their classroom, Brooke remembered about her Biology book she left on the backseat of Peyton's car. They both walked back to the parking lot so she could pick her book and were on their way back to the school building when Brooke felt a suddenly hit on the back of her left leg and wobbled foreword, losing her balance. Haley quickly reached out for her arm and grabbed it, keeping the girl from falling down.

Irritated, Brooke turned around shouting, "Hey, watch it!"

"Sorry! I didn't see you."

The rose cheeked boy had a sorry look on his eyes and his skateboard on his hands. He was standing right in front of Brooke and glancing down at her leg as she kept rubbing it, to make sure she was OK. She didn't say anything, just kept staring at the boy unable to stop smiling.

"Hi…" she dumbly whispered to him, making Haley roll her eyes.

He smiled back for a moment and then glanced back down to her leg, "Did it hurt?"

Thinking he was delivering a very cheesy line, Haley chuckled, "Excuse me?"

"The bump" he fast explained himself, realizing how he sounded before, "Your leg" he added to Brooke.

"Oh no, I'm fine" she put her hand on her leg and then swing it around to prove her point, "Thanks" she raised one eyebrow, watching him properly, "You're new."

"Kind of" he answered also with a permanent smile on his face.

She stretched her hand in the air for him to take, "I'm Brooke Davis, Senior Class President."

Taking her hand, he gently squeezed it, "Chase Adams. Nice to meet you."

Haley coughed to get their attention.

"Oh, and this is Haley" Brooke pointed to the dark blonde girl next to her.

"Hi" she shook Chase's hand.

"Nice to meet you" he turned his attention back to Brooke and pointed ahead, "I gotta go. Sorry again."

She scrunched her nose while smiling and then waved as he walked away, "Bye, Chase."

Both girls kept standing on their spots as the boy hopped on his skateboard again and rolled off. Haley turned to Brooke who was still following him with her eyes and slapped her arm.

"Oh, stop drooling!"

Being dragged by Haley, Brooke walked next to her with a dumb smile on her face, "You know in romantic comedies when boy and girl meet by accident and then discover true love?"

"That only happens in the end of the movie, it doesn't count if you already figured out."

"It's OK, I can play dumb."

Haley chuckled, "Not doubt about that."

Brooke bumped her hips on Haley's and they kept walking back to their classroom before the bell rang.

---

As people started to get settled on their seats, Nathan walked in the classroom and dropped his backpack on a desk next to Peyton. She was staring outside the window, without paying much attention to what was going on around her. He went closer to her and sat on the desk in front of her, turning back to talk to her.

"Hey" he caught her attention, "You OK?"

"Yeah" she lied for no reason, "Did Haley tell you what happened at Lucas'?"

He nodded, "Yeah. Sorry about that."

"Do you think she's right?"

"I don't know" he shrugged after a moment, "I mean, about Brooke. But about Lucas… he's with you and he really does like you. I don't think he'd be with you if he didn't mean it."

She sighed, leaning her chin on her hand, "I know that. But I can't forget what Haley said. How can I talk to Brooke about that?"

"It's better if you don't. She'd tell you if there was something, right? I mean, you told her."

"And look what that did to us" she bitterly chuckled but then reached out for his arm and gave it a gentle rub in appreciation, "Thanks, Nate."

He smiled back to her, "No problem."

---

Mouth threw a bottle of water at Lucas' direction. He caught it in the air and took a huge gulp after opening it, with Skills' laughter on his ear. Mouth threw another bottle at the second boy and tapped Lucas on the shoulder as Skills gave him a nod.

"Man, you're not on your game today."

He and Lucas had spent their last half hour playing a little one-a-one basketball at the Rivercourt with Mouth watching them from the bleachers. And Lucas was not playing at all that day.

"Girl problem?" Mouth asked already nodding.

"It's Peyton…" he sighed, "And Brooke."

"Damn, dawg! That again?"

"It's not like that" Lucas tried to clarify, "This time there's Haley, too."

Chuckling, Mouth dropped his two cents in, "Even I, with my very limited girl experience, know that when you have a problem with three girls at the same time, chances are you're the problem."

"I don't know, they're all crazy" putting the bottle back down, Lucas leaned against the bleacher.

"That I believe" Skills nodded, "The other day Bevin asked me if her dress made her look fat, I look at her and say no and she freaked out!"

Mouth, "You're not supposed to look, Skills. You just answer no, no matter what she's wearing. It's like a reflex."

"How do you know that?"

He shrugged, "I was raised with four girl cousins."

"I wished it was that easy" Lucas took a moment and then spoke, "Haley told me she thinks Brooke still has feelings for me."

Both Mouth and Skills took a moment and exchanged looks before looking back at Lucas sitting between them. Frowning, Mouth shrugged a little.

"And you don't think she does?"

"That's not the point, Peyton heard it."

"Oh dude…" Skills shook his head.

"Peyton said she didn't believe her but she's being weird now."

"Probably because she does agree with Haley. I mean…"

"What? Lucas looked from Mouth to Skills, "What?"

"Haley's right, dawg."

"No" he shook his head, getting up, "You're all insane" he tried to chuckle, "She does not. Why would she?"

"I don't know."

"Forget we ever said anything" Skills waved his hand in the air, "You OK with Peyton?"

Lucas nodded, "Yeah."

"Then never mind. Work things out."

* * *


	12. Touch The Sky

**A/N.: **_I know, shame on me for taking forever and a day to update. I even bet you all thought I forgot about this story but worry not, I didn't! I just had some huge problems with my muse and even though I have most of the fic written I thought of changing some of the plotlines several times but in the end I just decided to stick with what I already have. So sorry again for the longest delay ever, but here you go. Enjoy and review!_

* * *

Sitting up with her legs outstretched on Peyton's bed, Haley had a cup of ice cream on the top of her pregnant bump and a spoon on her hands. She took a sip from the ice cream and yelled at the bathroom's closed door.

"Come on, Brooke! You've been in there for ten minutes just to put on a dress. You still alive?"

"Don't kid about that" Brooke's yell came from the closed door and followed by her unlocking it and stepping outside to do a little twirl for Haley to see her dress, "So? What do you think?"

The burgundy dress went just above Brooke's knees and had a slightly loose sleeve that barely covered her shoulder completely. The cleavage wasn't too deep but Brooke's push up bra made it seem like it was more than the real thing, making her boobs pop up a little more than it should.

"Whoa" Haley pointed the spoon at her, "You look beautiful."

"Really?" she turned to check herself on the mirror for the eleventh time, "Don't you think it shows too much skin? I mean, he's a Clean Teen, it might look like I'm teasing or something."

Haley tilted her head, "If he's a Clean Teen then this is the only way he's ever gonna see your skin so give him something to look at!"

Seeing the girl laugh, Brooke opened her mouth on a fake disbelief, "Haley! You are bad" and then turned back to the mirror to fix her hair a little bit more. She was wearing it loose but with the long bangs next to her face a little curled.

"Chocolate chip cookie?" Haley offered.

"Hmmm!" Brooke skipped next to her and took the spoon out of her hand but then stopped herself, "Won't that spoil my appetite?"

"Can anything ever spoil your appetite?"

"Good point" she dipped the spoon on the ice cream and took it to her mouth. Once she tasted it, she made a face, wrinkling her nose a little, "Is that Ben & Jerry's?" Haley nodded, "Tastes funny."

"Really?" Haley peeked into the cup, "Tastes the same to me" she glanced up to Brooke and saw a frown on her forehead, "You OK?"

"Yeah" the girl forced a smile and went over the nightstand to pick up two different earrings, "Which one?" she held them in the air next to her ears for Haley to see.

"The left one."

**. . .**

Turning off the engine of the car, Chase turned around to meet Brooke's eyes. She was sitting next to him on the passenger's seat with an anxious smile on her face. He glanced out of the window, past her and to Peyton's house.

"Here we are."

Brooke nodded, "Tonight was really fun."

"Yeah, I had a great time" he flashed her another smile, "You're a very good company."

"Thanks, so are you."

"I had an idea" he put one arm around Brooke's seat and switched on his seat to turn around to her, "I've already seen how beautiful you look under the moonlight so I was wondering how you'd look under the first sun lights in the morning."

Raising one eyebrow, Brooke stared at him, "Chase Adams, isn't that against the first rule of Clean Teens?"

He chuckled, shaking his head, "No, I mean we could have breakfast tomorrow before classes."

"I'd love to" she answered sincerely happy with the invitation but then she remembered her chemo session first thing in the next morning. Suddenly she realized she'd have to go through the process of telling someone again if she really planned on keeping things with Chase. Scratching the back of her head she shook her head a bit, "But I can't. I already have plans."

"You have breakfast plans?" he asked a little suspicious.

She nodded, "Yeah. Peyton's dad is cooking us breakfast tomorrow morning. It's kind of a big deal since he doesn't really cook" she tried to smile but seeing his almost disappointed look, she sighed, "We could go the day after that."

"OK" he smiled again, "It's a date."

"OK" she smiled back and they stood in silence for a few minutes. She unlocked the door next to her and opened before sticking her legs out, "I'll see you tomorrow."

As she gave him one last dimpled smile and was ready to leave the car, Chase took her by the arm to make her stop.

"Brooke?"

"Yeah?"

She turned her head around to look at him and was surprised with his lips halfway to meet hers. Closing her eyes, she responded to the kiss. He ran his hand through her hair and placed it on the back of her neck while she put her hand on his wrist, prolonging the kiss for a moment.

"Good night" he whispered close to her when they broke the kiss at the same time.

"Good night" she whispered back between a shy smile and then left the car.

He waited for her to walk inside the house to turn the engine on again and drive away.

**. . .**

Walking inside the big house with a dumb smile on her face, Brooke barely noticed the lights on in the living room, so she was caught by surprise when she heard the TV noise as she walked by. Peeking inside, she saw Larry spread on the couch.

"Hey, Mr. Sawyer."

He turned his head around to see Brooke by the door, "How was the date?"

"It was good" she glanced over her watch. It was really late, "Why are you still up?"

Getting up from the couch, he turned off the TV, "I was waiting for you and Peyton. She checked in ten minutes ago."

She smiled a little awkward, "You were waiting for me?"

"Somebody's gotta take care of my girls" he winked and then placed a kiss on her head as he walked past her, "Good night, sweetie."

"Night" she waved watching him walk upstairs.

Already by the bedroom door, Brooke could see Peyton sitting on the chair by her desk, drawing something on her sketch book.

"Hey, roomie" she plopped on the bed, bouncing a little, "Did you know your dad was waiting for me?"

"Yeah, he told me" Peyton kept drawing.

Brooke threw her purse on the floor next to the bed and laid down on her belly, "I never had a parent waiting for me to check in after a date."

"You're luckier than you think" she closed the book, placing it on the desk and going to share the bed with her friend, "He's stricter than he looks, too. So how was the date with Chase?

"Pretty good" Brooke nodded, "He's really sweet and I think he likes me."

Observing the girl's facial expression and the hesitation on her voice, Peyton frowned, "So what's wrong?"

"He asked me out for breakfast tomorrow morning. I have chemo session so I had to reschedule" she sighed in frustration, "How can I tell him? I'll go: hey, the other night surely was fun but I forgot to mention that I'm dying?!"

The last part made Peyton shiver, "OK, first: don't talk like that. And second… if you can't tell him then you shouldn't date him anymore."

"I know. This sucks!" she fell back on the mattress, "Just when I found someone I think it's worth it."

"If you think he's worth it then give him a chance."

"You're right" she mumbled but then looked back at Peyton, "How was your talk with Lucas?"

"Good" she quickly answered, not really convincing.

"You never told me why you guys were weird in the first place."

"It was nothing. Silly stuff."

"With you two, I bet it was!" Brooke teased getting a pillow thrown at her head, "But you can't let those things drag you down. Relationships aren't always sunshine and rainbows… but you're happy, right? It's what you wanted."

"Right" she nodded agreeing.

"Then don't worry. If it's that silly you'll just get through it."

**. . .**

Almost two weeks went by and in this mean time, Brooke found it in her the strength to tell Chase about her condition and he responded better than she expected. In fact, he was being the most supportive person around her in the last few days, considering she was spending most of her awaken hours with him. In the interest of that, Chase had invited Brooke for some tennis lessons. He was decided to introduce her to every sport he knew so she could pick one so they could practice together. After the skateboard incident, where Brooke fell down on her butt and ended up with two scratched knees, the boy decided to teach her something less adventurous.

"C'mon, Nathan! I promise I'll be careful" Brooke whined with both hands together while she pleaded.

Following Nathan around the counter of the kitchen, she was starting to get irritated. Why wouldn't he just lend her his tennis racket already? Sitting on a couple of stools on the other side of the counter, Haley and Peyton were having milkshakes as they watched the scene, amused.

"Like you were careful with my bike helmet?" he asked pouring milkshake from the blender into a colored plastic cup.

A couple of days ago, Brooke borrowed his helmet so she could go cycling with Chase but something unclear happened to it and she returned it in two pieces. Nathan was still mad about it when she came asking for his racket.

"No, I mean _really _careful" she reassured him with a nod and then twitched her eyebrows again with her hands together close to her chest, "Please?"

Playing with the straw inside her cup, Haley frowned, "Why don't you have a tennis racket? I always thought that was a requirement of the rich people lifestyle."

Annoyed, Brooke rolled her eyes, "I did but my parents sold it on that garage sale last year when they went bankrupt."

"Well, my racket's gonna be no good to you anyway cause it's too big."

"Why did you buy a big racket?" Peyton finished her milkshake.

He shrugged, "Cause my hand's big."

Brooke chuckled, "You know what they say about big hands…" and slowly turned to Peyton, "And in this case it's true, right?" she chuckled again 'til she saw Haley's unpleased look, "O-kay…" she turned back to Nathan and saw him walking away towards the bedroom, "C'mon, Nathan!" she rushed to follow him.

"Fine!" they heard Nathan shout, "Let me go find it" followed by a squeal from Brooke.

Peyton and Haley were still by the stools, staring at the bedroom direction. Shaking her head, Peyton laughed, "She's hopeless."

"Yeah" Haley agreed and then sighed, "But I'm glad to see her this happy. Chase was almost a godsend."

"I don't think it had too much to do with Chase but with the fact that she has someone new with her" she got up to put her empty cup inside the sink, "You know, someone she can trust and share her feelings knowing that person loves her past all the bad stuff" she stopped for a moment to lean against the sink cabinet and sighed with a lost stare, "It's really important to her to have someone like this and that on top of al still challenges her daily" noticing Haley's look she quickly added, "You know, like him and extreme sports."

Rearranging her hair behind her shoulders, Haley put her milkshake aside and placed both hands on top of the counter as she carefully spoke, "I don't know if I still have the right to ask you this, but… are you and Lucas OK?"

Peyton attempted a smile, "People keep asking me that" then shrugged, "But we're good. Sometimes I feel like he's getting distant but then he pours his heart out to me and throws me off."

"He does that all the time. Whenever he has a problem he shuts himself down to everyone. You shouldn't take it personally."

Seeing how Haley was trying to comfort her, Peyton forced a smile, "I know. I don't."

They fell into a silence that was quickly broken by the sound of knocks followed by the door being opened and Lucas walking in.

"Hello!"

Haley turned around on her seat, "Hey."

"How are my girls?" he asked placing a kiss on Haley's forehead and going to peck Peyton on the lips.

She returned his kiss, "Talking about you."

He dramatically arched just one eyebrow with a suspicious look, "Good or bad?"

"Like there's any good thing to talk about you" Haley rolled her eyes as he squinted at her.

There was a loud thud coming from the bedroom, followed by a girlish scream.

"We're OK!" Brooke shouted for their relief.

Lucas glanced at the bedroom and took a couple of steps into the hallway, "What's going on?"

"Nathan's looking for his tennis racket for Brooke." Haley clarified.

Taking a seat at the same stool Peyton was sitting before, Lucas frowned at his friend, "What does she need a tennis racket for?"

"Chase's taking her for a tennis lesson."

"Brooke?" he laughed, "She has like no motor coordination."

"I heard that, Scott" Brooke came from the bedroom with a magazine in hands and playfully hit Lucas on the arm with it, "And FYI, I'm an extremely well coordinated person."

"Is that why there's a basketball resting at the bottom of the river from when I tried to teach you how to make a tree pointers at the Rivercourt?"

Opening her mouth in shock, she stopped next to Peyton by the sink, "You kept blocking me!"

"I was trying to make it realistic!"

"Well, realistically I'm a better cheerleader than a b-ball player, so…" she shrugged.

"Found it!" Nathan came back with the racket on his hands, "Here…" he handed it to Brooke but before she could take it, he retracted his hand with a warning, "Be careful!"

"I know!" she yanked it out of his hand, "Don't worry, I will be."

Shaking her head, Haley turned to Brooke, "What time is the class?"

"Uh…" Brooke glanced down at her watch, "In ten minutes. Geesh, I'm late!" she went around the living room to collect her purse and coat, "I'll see you later! Thanks again, Nate" she sent him a wink and then headed towards the door, waving, "Bye!"

They waved 'bye' back to her and watched her leave.

**. . .**

Lying back on one of her hands on the grass, Haley rubbed her pregnant bump with the other one while rocking her stretched feet from side to side. Peyton was sitting next to her, with her legs crossed in Indian style and watching as Nathan and Lucas were by the hotdog cart buying them some to eat.

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure" Haley kept making invisible circles with her index finger on the top of her bump.

"You and Nathan have been married for a while now" she glanced down to Haley next to her, "Does it ever get mechanic?"

Pondering for a moment, Haley frowned, "I'm not really sure what do you mean."

"You know, when things start repeating the same way, everyday, and before you know it, you're doing those things mechanically. Like automatically. As if you're trapped in some sort of routine."

"Well, let's see" Haley tilted her head to the side while wrinkling her eyebrows together, "Between eloping then me running away on a tour with Chris Keller, then coming back, almost getting divorced, getting married again, Nathan almost drowning, me getting pregnant and then almost getting killed by a hit and run… we didn't exactly have much time to get mechanically. We sorta made it up as we went along."

Finishing with a smirk, Haley made Peyton laugh. The blond shook her locks as the boys came back with the hotdogs and sodas on their hands. They handed it out to them and took seats next to the girls on the grass. Just as Peyton was taking the hugest bite she could on her hotdog, her cell phone started to ring inside her purse. Trying to chew everything inside her mouth, she turned to Lucas with a pleading look. He chuckled at her and reached over her cell phone. Brooke's name appeared on the screen and he flipped it open with a smirk.

"Have you hit Chase's head with the ball yet?"

"Lucas?" a rushed and confused voice asked on the other side of the line.

Looking back at Peyton, Lucas frowned, "Chase?"

"I thought I called Peyton."

Listening to the boy's weird breathing, Lucas felt a shiver down his spine, "She's right next to me. What's wrong?"

"It's Brooke" his voice cracked, "We're at the hospital."

"The hospital?" Lucas repeated agitated, making the other three sit up and hold their breaths, "Why? What happened?"

"She collapsed at the tennis court and hasn't waked up yet. I brought her in but they won't let me see her so I thought I'd call Peyton to get her dad here and see if we can find out what's going on."

"Alright, we'll be right there" he turned off the phone and without having to say anything; the four of them grabbed their belongings and took off to the hospital.

* * *


End file.
